A True Gryffindor
by Sylviehawthorn
Summary: Albus Severus Potter is in his fourth year at Hogwarts, but struggles with seemingly endless bullying and anxiety. He wants to be brave and strong like a true Gryffindor, but will need help from his family and eventually, Scorpius Malfoy. SLASH Albus/Scorpius pairing, trigger warnings for panic attacks and violence. some cute family bonding to come.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't and never will own Harry Potter (sigh)

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Albus Severus Potter was a lot like his father. He was placed in Gryffindor house with almost all of his cousin's, he had untidy dark hair and green eyes, and he had his father's and his grandfather's mischievous side. There were a few differences, Albus had flecks of auburn and red in his hair from his mother, and he had her kindness and her reasoning, Albus did not need glasses, and of course, he had no lightning bolt scar.

But there was one big difference that Albus thought to be true as he was growing up. You see, Albus and his siblings had been told the exciting and thrilling stories of the second wizarding war, and all the frightening but brave things his father and mother and their friends had done for the wizarding world. He had also been told about the tragedy of lives lost (his uncle Fred especially) and the relief of lives saved. Albus wanted to be like his father, brave and strong, and as he aged he almost felt he had to be. But when Albus joined Hogwarts, and despite being sorted into Gryffindor, he thought himself the opposite of brave. He thought himself weak, pathetic, sometimes not his father's son, alone, lost, a disappointment.

Albus had always been more reserved and quiet than his daring and bold brother James, who was somewhat an idle in Hogwarts (Albus watched many girls and boys trail after him because they wanted to be his friend or they just down right fancied him). Albus had never managed to be quite as witty and clever as his sister Lily, and envied her bright aura. Albus had thought himself average, plain, and he struggled to make any friends in his year, his only true friends were his family. Some Slytherins started to pick on him in his first year, calling him _Potter_ and whispering horrible comments in his ears in the corridors: "You're a feeble excuse of a wizard" " You're so scrawny, and stupid" He didn't know why they did it, but in the end he started to believe them, and he felt he deserved it for being so weak and not facing them like a true Gryffindor would.

That's when the panic attacks started

He had his first one halfway through his first year, in a packed corridor at break. Luckily he'd been walking with James and one of his friends. One of his Slytherin bullies Jeffrey Rowell, walked behind him and shoved him on the shoulder. Albus tensed and asked through the corner of his mouth so not to attract James' attention "what the hell do you want now". Rowell raised his eyebrows and said in a threatening voice "Don't be so feisty, or you'll regret it when I catch you alone in a corridor one day" Albus swallowed thickly but remained as calm as he could, then Rowell said "I shoved you because you deserve it, to remind you how pathetic you are, and because you're shaped like a stick, I thought you might snap if I applied too much pressure, I'd love to see you break" Albus' heart rate shot up, Rowell had started making more and more threats of violence towards him. Albus wanted his brother to notice Rowell but they were in too deep of a conversation about quidditch. Rowell grasped the back of Albus' neck, he felt the fat cold hand trap hairs on the back of his head, it was an iron grip. Albus didn't dare walk forwards a step, and Rowell whispered "I could easily break your neck right now"

That was it. Just as James spun round wondering where Albus had gone, Albus' breath hitched in his throat and he started to hyperventilate. His fingers tingled and his heart almost burst out of his chest it was going so fast. Albus clasped a hand to his fuzzy and sweaty head and whimpered a little. He felt Rowell's hand leave his neck and saw James' figure coming towards him. "Albus what's wrong? Can you hear me Al? Al?" Albus couldn't answer and his breathing got more rapid and desperate, he thought he was going to die. He felt himself being lead down a much emptier corridor, breathing got a little bit easier. James sat him down on one the window ledges and knelt so he was at Albus' level. Albus felt James gently put his hands on his shoulders and Albus looked up to meet his eyes. James looked worried and almost frightened, his brows were slanted and his eyes said worry. The air was getting easier to breathe now and Albus felt his heart slow down a little, but his hands still shook. "It's ok Albus. You're ok now. Deep breaths" James' voice was getting through to

Albus now and Albus did a long exhale. The worst was over now.

After a minute James asked in a cautious but gentle voice "Albus, what caused you to have a panic attack? You don't have to talk about it right now" he added quickly. Albus realised Rowell must have just escaped James' notice, and decided he didn't need to be burdened with that information. "I don't know, I think it was just the packed corridor maybe" Albus said quietly, "I'm sorry James"

James looked confused "What on earth for Al? You couldn't help it, there's no need to say sorry" Albus sniffed and stifled the lump in his throat. "I know, but I just feel weak, I feel like I've embarrassed you" James immediately protested, "That's silly Al, of course you're not weak! And you haven't embarrassed me, please don't beat yourself up" Albus felt a little better, but he still felt like he'd been an embarrassment to James. "Do you need to see Madam Pomfrey for anything or are you ok?" Asked James.

"No I'm ok now, thanks James"

"Anytime little bro, let's go" James said whilst he ruffled Albus' hair playfully. Albus didn't know it, but James was worried for Albus, he really didn't want his little brother to be hiding something.

After his first one, Albus had a few more in the rest of his first year and his second year, but thankfully he'd got into the routine of running before anyone could notice he was having one, if there was anyone around. The Slytherin Rowell and his pals still bullied Albus, which made it worse, but the worst they'd done physically was trip him up in a corridor, which had the consequence of another panic attack. Albus was feeling weaker and weaker, but he had no idea how much worse it would become in his fourth year.

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I'm really sorry if this is rubbish, reviews would be nice but if you find it terrible please don't be horrid


	2. Chapter 1

Hello again, I'm not sure how often ill be able to update but Itll be when I have free time which is now :). I have a few chapters prepared so updates shouldn't be toofar apart.

Umiko13- Thank you so much that means a lot! I think my Scorpius is quite alternative and quite different to Draco I hope you like him!

Albus boarded the Hogwarts express on the 1st of September ready for his 4th year at Hogwarts. He was a little excited, but extremely nervous to be going back to where he knew his anxiety had stemmed from. Rowell and his pals were in their fifth year now, and they were looking a lot tougher and stronger than when they were in their second year. James and Rose only saw the occasional name call from Rowell, they didn't know the full extent of the bullying Albus faced. James had witnessed a few panic attacks over the years, and he had once forced him to go to Madame Pomfrey for a calming draft, but James never told on him and he was so grateful. But unknown to Albus, James and Rose had been worrying for a while now.

Albus lent through the barrier to platform 9 and 3/4 and faced the scarlet red steam train. James followed through and clapped a hand on his younger brother's shoulder, Albus jumped. "You ok Al?" James said with concern in his voice. "Yea I'm fine James, you really don't have to keep asking me" him and Rose had been asking Albus over the summer how he was feeling a lot, and it was starting to annoy him. "Look Albus, please tell me if someone is giving you a hard time or hurting you. Me and Rose are worried you're drawing into yourself and even Lily suspects something's up. I know you keep saying 'I'm fine' but I feel like you're not the same" James was facing him now, the worry evident in his eyes. Albus didn't know what to say, he vowed to himself that he would put on a better show and do his absolute best to hide all his panic attacks from James. "I'm sorry you're worried James, but I'm honestly ok, I'm looking after myself." replied Albus with a smile to hide his lie. He hated feeling like he was being a burden to people. James smiled back and ruffled his hair, it was becoming a way for them to show brotherly affection and Albus liked it.

11 o clock was almost upon them, and Albus, James, and Lily kissed their parents goodbye before boarding the train. Harry Potter was very proud of his children, and always got a little emotional when he saw them board the Hogwarts express knowing they had many adventures to await them, and knowing their time at Hogwarts would be much safer than his. When it was Albus' turn for a hug of his dad, Albus didn't lean into the hug, he found the physical contact unsettling, and Harry pulled away and looked Albus in the eye. "Albus, if there's anything troubling you, please know I'm here for you, and me and your mother love you" Albus swallowed and tried to smile, he felt bad for lying and keeping things from his dad, but he knew it was for the best, he didn't want to look weak and he wanted his dad to know he was a true and brave Gryffindor. "I'm fine dad, I love you too" Albus replied. His father released him and the three children boarded the train, and they chose a compartment with all of his cousin's. Rose greeted Albus with a sincere hug, and whispered "Are you ok?" Albus didn't like all this hugging.

"Rose I'm fine" Albus said with as much defiance as he could muster. Rose hesitated, but seemed satisfied and they sat down for the train ride. Albus' insides felt like they were bubbling, he was worried about the first time he would see Rowell and what he would have up his sleeve for Albus to endure, and he was anxious about having to be around lots of people again where they might see his weaknesses, even being in the compartment made him nervous...an enclosed space where he couldn't run if he needed to. Albus watched his family play games of exploding snap and chat about the upcoming things that would take place at Hogwarts. He played a few games of exploding snap after Lily and Hugo's nagging. When Albus had played his last game, he looked out of the window and tried to focus his mind on the happier days that would come this year.

When they arrived at Hogwarts, they were greeted by Hagrid calling for the first years. He called down to Albus and the rest of the Potters and Weasleys "Welcome back you lot! Good summer?"

"Great thanks Hagrid!" James called happily, Albus gave Hagrid a warm smile and walked to the carriages. Albus had survived the train journey with no more scrutiny from James or Rose and was looking forward to the feast. They arrived in the entrance hall and waited to go in, but something stopped Albus in his tracks; he'd just seen Rowell and his mates and they were looking more threatening each year, their heads way above a lot of the crowd. Albus stood behind James who was slightly taller than him but kept calm, he could make it if they didn't see him. Whilst looking out for Rowell when walking to his house table, he spotted who he knew to be Scorpius Malfoy with the other Slytherins. Scorpius had sleek platinum blonde hair, which was disheveled in a stylish way. He had square glasses and was rather tall and thin. He had a defined jaw line and mysterious, round grey eyes. There was an intelligent and cool demeanour about him, and he looked at Rowell like he was something that didn't smell nice. Scorpius suddenly looked at Albus and Albus diverted his gaze quickly, he hoped his cheeks hadn't flushed. Albus had been questioning his sexuality ever since he started at Hogwarts, and discovered that that was bisexual. He hadn't told anyone, but if they asked he wouldn't lie. Albus sat down facing away from the Slytherins so he could focus his mind elsewhere. The sorting flew by, and a delicious feast appeared in front of them, Albus felt happy eating and talking with his friends and he began to relax. He went up to his dormitory that night feeling better than he had that morning. His room mates greeted him with little enthusiasm as Albus had never been able to make friends with them, but Albus didn't mind to much and he shut his curtains and got to sleep.

Really sorry if this chapter is rubbish, I wanted to establish the other characters and show their relationships :)


	3. Chapter 2

Hello guys, this is the next chapter right here, things start to get more dramatic!

Umiko13- Thank you for your kind review! I just imagined Scorpius as intelligent and I thought the glasses would suit him :)

welshgreendragon- Thank you, I hope you like this chapter!

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Luckily Albus didn't have any bad dreams involving Rowell and his mates, which would usually occur if he'd seen them or been bullied by them that day, but he knew they were to come. He couldn't hide from them forever. He found this out on his way to potions the next day, he was alone in an almost deserted corridor, and they crept up behind him. Rowell spun Albus around with force and laughed when he stumbled from surprise. "Well hello there Potter, I see you're still as scrawny and weak as you were when you were 11, haven't hit puberty yet?" Rowell sneered whilst his friends laughed, Albus averted his gaze but Rowell grabbed his chin, forcing him to look at Rowell. _Breathe, don't panic now_ Albus told himself. "Look at me when I'm talking to you dick head, not going to panic are you?" Rowell taunted. Albus glared but didn't speak as he was afraid he might scream with frustration. Rowell dug his nails into Albus' chin and Albus tensed and held his breath. _Please don't panic, please._ "Me and you are going to be seeing a lot more of each other this year, and we're going to have a lot of fun" Rowell said with a grim smile. He released Albus and stalked away. Albus stood shaking on the spot, trying desperately to slow down his heart rate with controlled breaths. Albus felt his face and realised Rowell had left finger nail marks on his chin, he prayed they weren't cuts otherwise James would notice. He suddenly remembered he had potions, and didn't want to be last to walk in. He walked quickly, attempting to exercise off the unease and anxiety in his chest.

Albus got to potions just in time, and took a seat near the back of the classroom so he could calm down completely in peace. They were with the Slytherins today, and Scorpius was watching Albus from across the room. Scorpius saw Albus' unnerved look as he sat down, and his brow furrowed. Scorpius had been hoping to become friends with Albus, but he felt there was something that he was missing. He had seen Albus running down corridors a few times with a look of pure panic on his face, and sometimes hearing his gasping breaths. He wondered what could have possibly upset him so much, and was even tempted to run after him and comfort him, but he always looked like he needed space and wanted to be away from people as he was running away from them. Scorpius suspected bullying, and he was convinced that it was the brute that was Jeffrey Rowell, as Scorpius was unfortunate enough to overhear his conversations about bullying someone to his mates. As he was looking at Albus, he noticed marks on his chin that did not look friendly, and noticed his chest rising and falling unevenly. Albus looked over and Scorpius smiled. To his amazement, Albus managed a smile back, but the lesson had started and they both had to look away.

Albus skipped lunch that day to try and master a spell to heal or cover up his marks. After further examination he realised they were indeed cuts and he really couldn't risk James or Rose seeing them. After many attempts he gave up, afraid he'd make them worse if he couldn't master the spell properly, and continued with his lessons in the afternoon with his hand covering his chin. By dinner time, Albus was very hungry and still feeling the effects of his meeting with Rowell, and was one of the first to arrive at the Gryffindor table. When he saw James and Rose he immediately rested his chin in his hand, and hoped that would suffice to cover up the marks, he ate the rest of his dinner one handed. "How was everyone's first day back?" Rose asked. _Terrible_ Albus thought, but he just smiled and said it was ok. James gave a heavy sigh "I've already got so much to do, O. are going to be difficult. I might not have time for as much quidditch!" James and Albus both loved quidditch, James was Keeper and Albus was Seeker for the Gryffindor team. Rowell or any of his other bullies were not on the Slytherin quidditch team, and it was where Albus felt totally at ease with the world when he was high above the ground on his broom.

Rose rolled her eyes and started telling James that his O. were much more important than quidditch at the moment, but James folded his arms and looked deeply offended at Rose's blasphemy against quidditch. Albus laughed "Sorry Rose but I agree with James, quidditch is always the most important thing." Hugo nodded in approval at his sister and she leaned back, defeated.

They all walked back to the Gryffindor common room- Albus being careful to walk behind them - and they sat around the fire. Albus was relaxing into the soft red arm chair, gazing at the flickering orange flames whilst his friends laughed. The flames reminded him of his mother's hair, and Rose's and Hugo's and Lily's. His family were extremely precious to Albus, he was so grateful for the friendship they had. He was pulled out of his day dream by Jame's voice asking him a question. "Albus, what's that on your chin?" He asked curiously. Albus' heart jumped and he quickly made an excuse. "Oh it was a nasty plant in herbology, tried to spike me, had to wrestle with it." _That was rubbish_ Albus thought but he kept his smile. James and Rose looked sceptical, but laughed anyway. Albus breathed a sigh of relief, and told his friends he was going to bed. That night, Albus made sure to put a silencing charm round his bed, as he knew that nightmares about Rowell would come into his mind tonight, and he didn't want to wake anyone up with any screams he might make.

 _Albus was walking alone down a dark corridor he didn't recognise in Hogwarts. The air was thin and cold, and the few torches that lined the walls gave off a weak and eerie glow. Albus felt two big hands grab his shoulders and he was shoved against the stone wall, he felt his spine protest at the impact. Albus was face to face with Rowell, he could feel his hot breath on his face and his eyes were filled with malice. "Hey Potter, I'm so glad I've caught you alone" he said in a deep grim voice. Rowell moved his hands up from Albus' shoulders so his thumbs were pressing down on his windpipe. Albus tried to breath but his airways were becoming more blocked. Albus tried to pry Rowells hands off him but his grip was too strong. "If you struggle I'll only make it worse, and it'll be all the more fun for me" Rowell said. Rowell removed one hand and balled his fist, Albus saw the fist heading straight for his face and braced himself for the impact, he let out a yell-_

Albus shot up in his bed, his yell still ringing in his ears. He was panting hard and put a hand to his chest and felt his pounding heart. Sweat had stuck to his forehead and night shirt and his eyes were still darting around making sure Rowell wasn't anywhere near him. Albus managed to calm down after a few minutes, and was thankful for the silencing charm around his bed. His nightmares concerning Rowell had been getting more and more violent, and this terrified Albus. He didn't have any experience in fighting or self defence, and Rowell would probably take his wand off him before Albus could attempt a hex.

He looked at his clock, it was half past 1 in the morning, so he had plenty of time to get back to sleep. But Albus lay awake, desperately trying to avert his mind from Rowell and the violent thoughts he brought with him. Albus fell into an uneasy sleep.

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I'm sorry this is a bit short! I'm really trying to keep them long


	4. Chapter 3

Hey guys, I may not have time to update as much as I'm loaded with college work again :(, but I'm still writing it won't be abandoned. Thank you for the lovely reviews it means so much, keep reviewing and reading!

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Albus' first week passed by without any more encounters from Rowell, but he had been noticing Scorpius Malfoy staring at him from across the great hall a few times. Albus had to stop himself from staring back, but he always smiled over to Scorpius to be polite, he wondered if the boy wanted to begin a friendship. Albus also began to notice just how attractive the Malfoy was. His hair seemed to reflect any light, and his grey eyes were soft and sincere.

He had dainty, almost pixie like features, and Albus liked the way he rested his chin on his delicate looking hands...

James waved a hand in front of Albus' face. "Stop day dreaming Al, we have important quidditch tryouts soon!" Quidditch try outs were the third week back, and Albus and his brother James couldn't wait to be back in the air with the team. "I'm telling you, if Roxanne doesn't let us on the team I'm never speaking to her again" James said, and Albus laughed. Roxanne Weasley was in her 7th year and had been named captain of Gryffindor quidditch team this year. She was a Chaser, and Albus would be trying for Seeker and James for keeper. Albus was hoping no one would take his spot on the team he'd had since second year, it was one of his few happy places in his school life.

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It was a cool September day for the quidditch try outs and Albus had been practicing with his brother over the past week. Rose, Lily and Hugo had come to support James and Albus and sat in the stands smiling and giving the occasional wave. Albus was nervous, he really wanted to make the team, and he was worried about being so closely observed by the potential team members.

Roxanne released the quaffle, the snitch and the bludgers, and Albus kicked hard off the ground and felt the wind take his breath away. For a few seconds all he heard was the wind in his ears, _this is where I belong_ Albus thought, and then he slowed down half way across the pitch to look for the snitch. He glanced at James at one end of the pitch and gave him a thumbs up. James didn't have time to answer as the quaffle came hurtling towards him, and he did a spectacular save. Albus and the rest of the crowd cheered for James and Roxanne looks impressed. As Albus darted his eyes in all directions looking for a shimmer of gold, he saw an unexpected guest in the stands. Scorpius was sitting alone watching the action with interest, and looked to Albus and gave him a small wave. Albus was taken aback, _was he spying for the Slytherin team?_ Albus in spite of the thought gave a small wave back, but then concentrated on finding the snitch before his rival Marcus Creevy. Eventually, Albus spotted the golden fluttering wings of the snitch and zoomed after it. He was miles quicker than Marcus, and caught the snitch right in front of Rose and the others. Roxanne blew her whistle and signalled for Albus to land. "Congratulations Albus, you're once again seeker!" She said and clapped a hand on his shoulder. Albus winced a little, but was overjoyed and relieved he'd made the team. Albus waited for the try outs to end - James made keeper - and he got changed and walked to the castle with his family. Scorpius walked up to Albus on the way back to the castle, "Well done Albus, that was a really great catch" he said in a cool voice. Albus felt a strange warmth in chest he wasn't familiar with and grinned at Scorpius, James however wasn't pleased. "Hope you're not spying for the Slytherins Malfoy, there'll be trouble if you are" James said defensively. Scorpius rolled his eyes "You don't have to worry about that, the Slytherin quidditch team don't concern me. And its Scorpius if you don't mind." He added coolly. Scorpius walked ahead, a slight frown on his face. Albus was dumbfounded. James looked annoyed "If I find out he's been spying-"

"Then it won't matter James, we're still an excellent team." Albus cut in to save any arguments.

Albus was feeling the happiest he had since arriving at Hogwarts, but he knew it would not last. It came crashing down when Albus had made the mistake of leaving a glove in the changing rooms and had to dash back to get it. "Go on without me, I'll meet you back in the common room" he called to his friends. As Albus was about to climb the staircase, he was stopped by someone grabbing his shirt from behind. _Shit. Rowell._ Albus thought. "This is my lucky day" began Rowell, he had his companions with him, 2 others. "All of us together, without any disturbances, this will be fun." Rowell cracked his knuckles and gave Albus a grim smile. Albus could feel a panic attack rising so fast it was like bile in his throat, he felt himself begin to shake and he tried to keep his breaths even. _I could run now_ Albus thought. He began to slowly back away from them, keeping his hand over the pocket with his wand in, and asked "Why are you doing this" in the steadiest voice he could. Rowell laughed, "Oh Potter, we're doing it because you deserve it, and you're our entertainment for the evening! Now, let's see if you're really as weak as you look" Albus spun round so fast he thought he might have apparated by accident. He'd only managed to run up 4 steps before 3 pairs of hands seized him back, Albus let out a yell. Rowell's two companions pinned Albus' arms to the banister, and Rowell glared down at him. Albus was in full panic mode now, his head was fuzzy and he felt like there was no oxygen in the air as his chest heaved up and down. "I'll make sure you don't try and run away from me again you little shit." Rowell growled. He punched Albus hard in the stomach 3 times, each time enjoying the whimpers of pain Albus let out. He grabbed Albus' neck with one hand and punched him hard in the face with other, the impact caused Albus' nose to bleed and Albus grunted in pain. Albus was screaming on the inside, every inch of him wanting to shut down and hibernate. He felt his neck being squeezed and had to stop himself gagging too much. Albus felt another punch to his face before he was released and he slumped to the ground, gasping and panting from the pain. Rowell kicked Albus hard and spat beside him. Albus heard Rowell hiss in his ear "If you tell anyone we beat you up I swear you and your friends will be dead." before Rowell and the others walked away, leaving Albus on the floor.

Albus couldn't breathe, he felt like he was drowning, and no one was here to save him. Albus managed to heave himself up from the ground and stumble up the stairs to where the Gryffindor common room was. He stopped in his tracks, _how am I going to explain this? They'll think I'm weak, they'll probably laugh because I didn't defend myself. They can't know, they'll get hurt._ Albus was walking hunched over and his face was probably a mess, plus he was still in panic attack mode. Albus slid down the stone wall clutching his stomach, and attempted to bring his breathing back to normal. He could feel tears stinging his eyes as he leant his head against the wall. _This is the worst._ Warm tears ran down his face and the salt water was harsh on the cuts on his face. Albus' heart started to slow to a normal pace as the panic attack began to subside. The humiliation of having being beaten up by Rowell washed over him, and a new wave of tears spilled from his eyes.

Albus wasn't sure how long he sat there crying quietly, but when the sobs died down, he managed to stand up and breathe almost normally. He could feel dried blood on his face and it was on his hands and clothes, so he walked slowly and painfully to the boys bathroom to clean up. Albus looked at himself in the mirror with disgust. His nose and cheeks were covered in dried blood and there was a cut across the bridge of his nose. Albus could tell it was broken, and he was grateful he knew how to perform the episkey spell. A black eye was forming on the right side of his face, Albus lifted up his shirt to see the damage on his stomach. He winced as he saw 3 dark blue bruises clumped together on his abdomen, they would be there for a while. _I'm so useless, no Gryffindor should end up like this_ , Albus thought. Albus cleaned the dried blood off his face, and pointed his wand at his nose and muttered "episkey". There was a crack and Albus grunted as his nose slipped back into its rightful place. His reflection had improved greatly, but there was still a small cut on his nose and cheek and the black eye was forming rapidly. Albus attempted to heal the cut on his nose, and after several attempts he got it so it was just a faint red line. But the black eye was proving hard to conceal, and he decided he could dodge James' eyes with it for now. Albus trudged back to the common room, doing his best to conceal the pain he was in. When he entered the room, his friends were sitting by the fireplace. Before they could ask what took him so long he rushed past them and shouted in the calmest voice he could muster "Sorry guys, really tired, g'night!"

Albus didn't see, but James and Rose turned to each turned to each other with confused and worried looks on their faces.

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So this chapters got more violence and is a lot longer which was my aim, hope you enjoyed!


	5. Chapter 4

Hello again :) my chapters are getting longer every time, this is the longest one yet! Theres more Albus and Scropius in this one too, hopefully I'll update soon, please keep reviewing!

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Albus fell into frightening and disturbing dreams that night, and awoke several times sweating and panting with fear. When morning finally rolled around, Albus touched his face where he had been punched. His eye was somewhat swollen and the bruising stung harshly at his light touch, this wasn't a good sign. Albus crept up before his roommates and checked his reflection. His eye was surrounded by black and blue colours and underneath his eye the tissue had swollen, but not enough that he couldn't open his eye properly. His nose was all fine, but the bruises on his stomach were still as bad and painful. Albus tried quietly to conceal his bruise again, all he could manage to do was make the colours a little less harsh; maybe that was wishful thinking. _Why is this spell so bloody hard?_ He thought angrily as he tossed his wand on his bed, the action only aggravated the painful bruising on his stomach and he clutched it in pain. He got silently dressed into his uniform, but sat on his bed contemplating the mess he was in.

If he went downstairs with the black eye, James would immediately know he was being bullied and demand to know who it was, and if Albus told him it would be his fault if Rowell hurt James or the others. He couldn't hide his black eye, and he seriously doubted James would believe him if he said it was an accident. He could picture James raising his dark eyebrows at Albus saying something like _I fell over_ or _a spell backfired._ Albus realised it was getting late and walked down to the common room with a slight hunch as his stomach was so sore, Rowell's shoe had hit his stomach with full force. He had hoped that James and the others would be somewhere else, but unfortunately they were already waiting for him. _Shit shit shit._ Albus couldn't turn back, they'd seen him and James' eyes were fixed on his black eye. He watched as anger, sadness, and confusion flashed through James' eyes all at once. Rose looked so worried it was scaring Albus, and Lily's mouth was open ajar. Albus tried to straighten up but that only made his stomach protest in pain and he winced visibly. Before Albus could say hi James cut in. "Albus, what the hell happened to you?" He said firmly.

Albus stuttered "Well...I um-"

"Don't try and think of a lie Albus, tell me the truth right now." James cut in with a dangerous tone. His brows were furrowed over his glaring eyes, and he had his arms folded. Albus' eyes darted from James to the others and back, he felt like they were closing in on him, like they were walls pressing against him, like vultures circling- Albus realised this was a panic attack coming on and he tried to wipe the sweat forming on his hands and forehead. He began to tremble as he fought to find something to say. " James I- I can't tell you" Albus said weakly. "Of course you can Albus, you can trust us" Rose said. Albus just shook his head as he tried to remember how to breath normally. James suddenly looked more frightened, "Albus, is someone threatening you?" Albus trembled more as his breaths became short and weak. James sensed the panic attack and lead Albus outside the common room. "Come on Al, we'll go somewhere quiet." James said calmly as he walked Albus to the portrait, the others stayed behind watching them with worry.

Albus' eyes were wide as his breaths came out in short bursts of anxiety, his ears were ringing and his hands were trembling slightly. He stumbled out of the portrait after James, and he felt the coolness of the stone corridors hit him. He leant against the nearest wall and slid down it, with his hands in his head. Albus was on the verge of a breakdown, he couldn't escape not telling James about Rowell but he wanted to be brave and protect James and the others from him. James knelt in front of him, looking more worried than before. "Hey Al, it's ok, we're all here for you, nothing's going to hurt you here." James said soothingly. Albus couldn't lift his head out of his hands, he could feel tears and didn't want James to see him cry, James would probably think he was weak and a baby. "Come on Al, tell me who did this, please. I'm your brother."

"James I-I can't, you'll get hurt" Albus replied through suppressed sobs. James tensed, "Someone _is_ threatening you aren't they! Albus please tell me, this is serious." Albus couldn't hold back his crying now, which only made his panic attack worse, he felt like there was no air in his lungs. James put a gentle hand on Albus' shoulder "I'm sorry Al, you're ok" James said gently. As Albus took a deep breath, he aggravated his bruises on his stomach and winced visibly as he hissed in pain, those bruises were killing him. James drew back his hand suddenly and looked at Albus with fear in his eyes. "Albus look at me." Albus looked up slowly. "They didn't just give you a black eye did they. What have they done to you Al?" James asked slowly. James would only worry more if he saw Albus' stomach, and Albus cursed himself for wincing. "Nothing, I'm fine." Albus replied with as much conviction as possible. "I saw you wince Albus, please don't lie." James sounded more angry now. "What did they do to you?" James asked again. Albus was shaking, he didn't want to relive it, talk about, he wanted to run away from James and the mess he was in. "It's just some bruises...on my stomach." Albus stuttered nervously. James swore. "Please James, not now. I'll tell you more soon but I just want to calm down and forget about it for now." Albus almost pleaded to James, looking at him with watery eyes. James stood and thought for a moment, "Alright Albus, but you have to promise me you'll talk." Albus let out a sigh of relief. "Do you need to go to Madame Pomfrey?" Asked James. "No thanks I'm fine, don't worry." Albus finally began to calm as James helped him up off the floor, he was in the clear for now. "Do you think Rose could cover my black eye? I don't want to draw attention." Asked Albus, wiping the remaining moisture from his face as he got his breathing back to normal. James nodded and they walked through the portrait and rejoined the others.

"Albus, are you ok?" Asked Lily in a timid voice. Albus felt bad for Lily, and not telling her the truth when she was clearly worried. "I'm fine Lil, don't worry about me" Albus said and ruffled her hair, she giggled. "Rose can I talk to you?" Albus asked her, and the others went off for breakfast. "Please could you cover my black eye, if you can, I don't want it to attract attention." Rose sighed at Albus, "Yes I will, but covering up the problem won't help Albus, you know that. You have to open up to us." She said, and she reminded him very much of aunt Hermione. Albus' guilt had escalated, but he knew it was for the best not to tell them about his bullies. He felt Rose's spell work on his eye, and they both set off for the great hall. When they sat down, Albus suddenly didn't feel like eating when he saw the Slytherin table, and saw Rowell looking at him with a malicious smile. Albus tried very hard to listen to the conversation happening next to him, but his mind still wandered to the bad events of last night. He felt vulnerable, exposed to them, like they could strike at him at any moment. _This isn't how I should be, I shouldn't be weak, I should be brave and courageous just like my dad, like a Gryffindor._

Albus didn't realise in his musings that he had walked straight into Scorpius outside the great all. He was staring at those sparkling grey eyes and the pixie like face. Before Albus could snap out of his daydream and say sorry, Scorpius cut in, "Can we talk?" He said seriously. Albus raised an eyebrow but agreed, and they went down a side corridor to talk. "Did Rowell and his mates get you last night? I heard them talking about hurting someone, and I saw you wincing a little over your stomach, and Rowell was staring grimly at you just now in the hall." Scorpius began. "I'm sorry if it's non of my business, but I quite like you, and I hate them, and I'm worried for your safety." Scorpius blushed a little.

Albus was a little stunned, but felt that same warm glow in his chest he had got when Scorpius had congratulated him on making the quidditch team. Then he thought for a moment "How did you realise I was wincing?" Albus asked. Scorpius blushed a bit more and bit his lip, _he's quite cute..._ Albus thought. "I just...noticed, when you sat down. I'm not stalking you!" Scorpius said shyly. Albus smiled. "Well you're right, they did get me. I fixed my injuries on my face but my stomach had a brief encounter with Rowells shoe" Albus said, surprised at his calmness in talking about this to Scorpius. Scorpius looked sad "Shit, are you alright?"

"Yea I'm ok" Albus said but didn't quite agree with the words. Scorpius looked like he didn't believe them either."I'm sorry about them, please don't think I'm like them because I'm Slytherin too"

"Course not!" Said Albus. There was a pause before Scorpius said "If you need to talk, you can talk to me-if you want to. I know we don't know each other that well and there's history between our parents, but I don't really care about that." The glow in Albus' chest got stronger. "Thanks, I'd really like that." Albus replied with a smile. Scorpius smiled too, and after a few moments of nervous laughter, they parted with awkward waves.

Albus walked back to the common room with a spring in his step. He never thought he would build up a friendship with Scorpius Malfoy, and he wondered how his dad would feel about it, but he didn't really care. Scorpius had been nicer to him than anyone else at Hogwarts, besides his family, plus he was extremely cute... _I think I fancy him_ Albus thought, and felt his heart speed up a little. The rest of the day passed without event as his lessons were dull, but he couldn't take his mind off his encounter with Scorpius.

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Hope you enjoyed! Love Sylvie


	6. Chapter 5

Hi guys! So so sorry for the late update I've been so busy, hope you like this one x

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When Albus and his friends sat in their usual spot in the common room that night, his spirits were significantly higher than they had been since getting on to the quidditch team, despite the fact he was doing homework. Albus was trying to concentrate on doing a potions essay, but kept catching James' eyes that were staring at Albus intently. He knew what James was thinking about, he was waiting for him and Albus to talk about recent events, and for Albus to open up to him. He had to admit he had felt better after opening up to Scorpius, but for some reason he felt embarrassed at the thought of telling James about him getting beaten up by someone. Albus just kept smiling and then pretend to be very interested in his potions essay, staring determinedly down at it. He didn't want to tell James about it, and for Rowell to try and hurt them or Albus, he suspected James would try and confront Rowell being who he was. He had felt better about telling Scorpius because he had guessed and Rowell didn't know they were friends so hopefully he wouldn't find out. Albus wanted to protect himself, and didn't want to be a burden for anyone. He noticed Rose had now joined in on the staring at Abus game James had started, and Albus began to feel irritated by their stares.

After a few moments, Albus looked up from his essay at them. "Do I have something on my face? Why are you both staring at me constantly?" He asked impatiently. Rose looked a little sad, and James sighed. "Albus, you still haven't told us what happened to you, it's killing me, us, that you're hiding something." Said James. Albus swallowed the guilt that rose in him, and looked down. "I don't have to tell you things you know, it was nothing-"

"It didn't bloody look like nothing!" James snapped with force. "James" Rose said with warning, and James recoiled his anger back. Albus was surprised at James' anger with him, "You don't have to snap at me. It's my decision whether I tell you things or not. It's my business" Albus said with defiance. "Yes but this is about your safety Albus! You said you would tell me about it this morning!" James replied.

"Well I changed my mind." Albus said bluntly, and he began to pack his stuff away. "And I am safe, you don't need to protect me." He added despite not believing it. Rose and James pleaded with him to stay, but Albus stormed away up to the dormitory and didn't come back down that evening.

Albus lay awake in bed that evening, facing the ceiling, contemplating the recent events. Thinking about Scorpius still made his heart skip a little, and he couldn't wait to get to know him better. Thinking about James and the others made him angry, them prying into his life. Yet it made him feel guilty for hiding his true feelings, and Albus did feel his safety was breached after Rowell's attack. Albus decided he'd sit with Scorpius in potions the next day, he needed his calming presence, and to talk to him.

*****************time break****************

Albus walked to potions the next morning in a glum mood. He hadn't spoken to anyone that morning as James was still annoyed with him. As he entered the classroom, he saw Scorpius seated near the back of the classroom. He caught his eye and made his way to sit next to him. Scorpius appeared surprised but smiled when Albus sat down, and Albus felt that glow in chest when he saw Scorpius' warm smile. "How are you doing?" asked Scorpius quietly. "Not too bad thanks" replied Albus with a small smile. "We'll go for a walk after this, if you're free?" asked Scorpius.

"Yea I am, sure." Albus felt excitement in his stomach at the prospect of having a good hour with Scorpius, all to himself. Suddenly time felt like it was going at a snail's pace for Albus, and potions dragged. Albus kept stealing glances at Scorpius, he was so distracting to him he barely took any notes the whole lesson.

When the lesson was finally over, Scorpius and Albus looked to each other and left the room side by side. "Come on, I know a good place we can talk." Scorpius said quietly, and touched Albus' shoulder to lead him in the direction of the Astronomy tower. Albus' shoulder tingled pleasantly at Scorpius' touch, _calm Albus he only touched you_ he thought. They climbed the stairs in surprisingly comfortable silence, and the view of the rolling clouds and the glittering lake from the Astronomy tower was very picturesque. They sat side by side, and Scorpius took a deep breath in, as if enjoying the smell of the air. "So Albus, what's up?" he asked. Albus thought for a moment, and said "Well my friends aren't talking to me because I didn't want to tell them who beat me up. I got angry with them and I feel bad. I just can't bring myself to tell them about it, I feel...embarrassed." Scorpius looked at Albus with empathy and understanding eyes. "I can understand, but they just want you to be safe. I really think you should tell them." Albus swallowed, he really didn't know where he'd get the courage to tell them, plus he was scared they'd get hurt. "It's not just that though...they- they threatened my friends if I told them it was them that beat me up." Albus said quietly, he felt his heart speed up with the fear of it. Scorpius raised his brows and thought for a moment. "You should still tell them, and tell Professor McGonagall and she should keep you and your friends safe-"

"No!" Albus said suddenly, then composed himself. "I mean I just don't want the school involved, they'll tell my parents and I don't want them knowing" "Why not? They could help you."

"No, I don't want them to know, they'll ask too many questions, I don't want them to know I'm being bullied." Albus said quickly. Scorpius looked puzzled at Albus, and Albus looked down. "Albus, is there something else you don't want them to know?" Scorpius asked tentatively. Albus felt himself heat up, and he twiddled his hands together. He didn't want his parents to find out about his panic attacks, or the school, he couldn't stand the thought. But Albus stayed silent, and tried to breath calmly whilst not looking at Scorpius. Scorpius didn't pry and just offered a small smile to Albus as if to say 'I understand'. The boys left the Astronomy tower and parted ways in the corridor. "I'll see you soon Al" said Scorpius, "I'm here if you need me."

"See you" replied Albus, realising he'd used his nickname, and Albus smiled to himself. Scorpius was having a big impact on him...


	7. Chapter 6

Hello again! Thank you for all your kind reviews, I'm so glad you like it. This is a good long chapter because I'll be very busy again next week so probably won't have time to write. Plus I'm going through a difficult patch at the moment so sorry about that. I hope you enjoy x

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A few days went by before Albus made up with James and the others. The conversation was awkward and there wasn't much direct eye contact, but they came to an agreement in the end. Albus told them that it was some Slytherin 5th years that beat him up, but he didn't name names as he looked to James and said "I don't want you to go and get yourself in serious trouble and do something stupid. Don't go chasing anyone, I'm fine." James looked like he couldn't trust himself either, but still looked suspiciously at Albus. Of course Albus was lying, he wasn't really fine, but they didn't need to know, besides he felt slightly better after befriending Scorpius. "Please promise us you're safe Albus." said Rose with concern. Albus swallowed thickly but said "I promise" without wavering. "If they ever hurt you again I won't be so nice anymore." warned James. He felt very guilty for lying, but it was for the best.

Albus had his first quidditch match of the season against Slytherin, and had been practicing hard which had kept his mind off his anxiety and Rowell. Roxanne was really pushing the team, but Albus felt fit and strong when he was working hard in the air, and he didn't often feel strong. When the morning of the match arrived tensions were high in the great hall, and there was excited chatter amongst the house tables. Albus was feeling very nervous for some reason, and struggled to keep down his breakfast and keep his jittering hands steady. James however was raring to go, he was wolfing down some eggs on toast and Rose watched with both amazement and disgust. "You'll get indigestion." she said warningly. "Inde-what?" said James through a mouthful of toast. Rose rolled her eyes and Albus giggled. "So Al, you ready to win this?" asked James.

"I hope so" replied Albus.

"I think you meant 'Yes James!'"

"Yes Sir!" mocked Albus and he did a salute. Albus looked over to the Slytherin table, and he saw Scorpius sitting with some people he didn't know, looking slightly bored. He didn't appear to be wearing much support for his team, and he pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose casually. He saw Albus and smiled, and Albus returned the smile, suddenly feeling calmer. Scorpius mouthed good luck, and Albus mouthed thanks back, he felt he had a good chance of winning now. Albus' eyes wandered along the table, when they fell on Rowell's eyes. Albus gulped. Him and his mates were looking at Albus like he was a piece of meat, and Albus felt like a sitting duck, he felt very vulnerable. Albus' heart dropped to his stomach when he saw Rowell crack his knuckles and point to him, then he tapped his wrist as if to gesture about the time. Albus took this as Rowell was going to hurt him again very soon, and it was about time. Albus took in a sharp breath and quickly excused himself. He needed space to calm down for the game and he needed all his focus to be on that snitch, not those dick heads. He didn't look behind him as he left the great hall, and he leant against the cool stone of the castle walls while he got his breath back.

A few minutes later when Albus was significantly calmer, people started to file out of the great hall in excited chatter. James saw Albus and strode over to him. _Oh God, I really don't want a pep talk right now_ thought Albus. James put his hand gently on Albus' shoulder as if not to frighten him. "You look scared. Please tell me everything's alright." said James softly.

"I'm fine, I just needed some air, I'm a bit nervous." said Albus. James furrowed his brows, but stepped back from Albus. "Come on, we've got a game to win. We need you Al"

Albus grinned and followed James to the Quidditch Pitch to change.

Albus changed quickly and then there was a final talk from Roxanne. The air was thick with nerves and anticipation. "Right you lot, let's see all our hard work pay off today. I know we're capable of beating them easy, so don't let the crowd or the pressure get the better of you." she said encouragingly. The team walked onto the pitch and received cheers from the Gryffindors and the other houses, and a few boos from the Slytherins. The sun was just visible through some heavy grey clouds, and the air was chilly. _At least it'll keep me cool._ Albus liked to feel the winds icy fingers running through his hair during a quidditch match, it kept him focused and calm. The Slytherin team were facing them, looking mean but not impossible to beat. Both teams mounted their brooms, and the referee Madame Collins was ready to release the quaffle. "Ready" she said clearly. She threw the quaffle high in the air and the game began. Albus kicked hard off the ground and was immediately searching for the snitch, circling the pitch and getting a feel of the wind. He watched the quaffle be tossed around, before Gryffindor scored their first goal, they were ahead already. In their celebration one of the Slytherin chasers got the quaffle and was hurtling towards James at frightening speed. The quaffle flew to the left hoop and Albus held his breath, but James made an impressive dive and caught it. The Gryffindors cheered James' name. When the game was Gryffindor 50-40, Albus finally caught sight of the golden wings of the snitch, and immediately sped towards it. The other seeker soon followed him in pursuit. He was zooming around the stalls and above people's heads, but kept all his focus on what was in front of him, and the crowd had noticed the chase for the snitch. _Come on come on come on, almost there._ Albus' mind was clear, he outstretched his arm ready to grab the snitch. _Come on!_ His brain was screaming at him and the wind was whipping his face, he could faintly hear the crowd cheering him on. He lunged his arm forward and felt the metal in his hands, he'd done it. _Yes!_ Albus dived to the ground but landed gracefully, and was welcomed by his teammates slapping his back in praise. The crowd was roaring with applause and Albus smiled up at the stands, and held the snitch up to the sky. It was then he noticed how the metal was not cold, but was burning his hand like fire.

Albus yelled in pain and shook the snitch out of his hand. He looked to the ground expecting to see flames coming out of the snitch, but it was completely innocent looking. Albus frowned down at it and looked to his hand. There was an angry looking circular burn on the palm of his right hand. "What's up Al? Is that a burn mark?" said James.

"The snitch did it, you try picking it up." replied Albus. James looked sceptical but picked up the snitch. At first nothing happened, but then James hissed in pain and dropped the snitch, shaking his hand as if to cool it. "What the hell?" exclaimed James. "Madame Collins! The snitch, it's burning out hands." Madame Collins strode over and looked at Albus' and James' hands, then picked up the snitch herself. It did nothing to her. "How strange, I can see the burn marks on your hands." she thought for a moment, then beckoned Roxanne over to her. She put the snitch in Roxanne's hand, and she took hissed with pain and dropped it. "Why is it burning?" she asked whilst rubbing her hand. "Someone's cursed the snitch to burn the Gryffindor quidditch team." said Madame Collins with shock. The pitch had quitened now, and the team looked at each other with anger and surprise on their faces. Albus immediately thought of people who could of done this, the Slytherin Quidditch team, or Rowell. Most likely the latter, as it would mean they could harm and scare Albus without being direct suspects. Albus suddenly felt very uneasy, he felt like this was a warning, or something just beginning. He remembered the gesture Rowell had done to him across the table that morning. _Oh God._

"You all go back to your dormitories except for Albus James and Roxanne, I'll take this to the head teacher and you can show your burns. Sorry to delay your celebrations." said Madame Collins. They followed her quick pace to Professor McGonagall's office. "Who would do such a petty thing like this?" said Roxanne on the way. "I bet you it was the Slytherin team's captain, I bet they're all in on it, slimy gits." said James with anger. That's what Albus wanted to believe, but somehow he couldn't. "Still, didn't stop us from winning, excellent catch Albus!" said Roxanne with a smile. Albus shrugged smiling, "I guess so, thanks." replied Albus. He looked to his burn again, this would be a reminder of the fear he felt because of Rowell, if it was them. He really hoped it wouldn't leave a scar. They reach McGonagall's office and stepped inside after Madame Collins gave the password. "Ah hello, congratulations you three, the game was exquisite." said the Professor, and she smiled a gentle smile to them. "What's the trouble Madame Collins?"

"Well Minerva, the snitch, it's burning the Gryffindor Quidditch team's hands. Look." and they all showed their circular burn marks, Albus' being the worst. "It doesn't burn me. I think it's cursed." finished Madame Collins. Professor McGonagall appeared stern and confused, and she took up the snitch in her hands, it did not burn her. She took out her wand and muttered something under her breath, and the snitch made a wailing sound, like a flock of geese in pain. Albus though it horrid and wanted to cover his ears. The Professor frowned and looked very annoyed. "You are right, it is a curse, thankfully not a deadly one, just a simple burn. But this is still severe, it's sabotage, and its dangerous! Madame Collins, round up the Slytherin Team immediately, and I want all their wands checked with priori incantatem and question them about this. Bring them here. You three go to Madame Pomfrey and get your burns seen to." She dismissed them with a wave of her hand, and Albus could see her anger.

Albus knew, somehow, that they wouldn't find the guilty party in the Slytherin Team. He just knew it was Rowell, and Albus could see his scowling face in his mind, enjoying that he'd most likely get away with this. Albus shivered back into reality as he felt the cool ointment on his palm. " There you go dear. That should heal it in no time, you can go now." said Madame Pomfrey. When they arrived at Gryffindor tower they were greeted with applause and cheering, Albus received several pats on the back. After the chatter had died down, they told the whole common room about what had happened with the snitch, and everyone was both fascinated and concerned. Rose piped up "That's disgusting! That curse could have been anything!" she exclaimed in worry. James laughed slightly "Yeah, but even their silly curse didn't stop Al getting hold of the snitch!" and the common room cheered again. Albus was conflicted. He felt great knowing he'd won the game and been able to hold on to the snitch, but he was constantly anxious about Rowell and it was shitting on his mind. He felt watched, as if Rowell would spring out at any moment. Nevertheless, Albus smiled at the common room, and half enjoyed the celebrations, half didn't.


	8. Chapter 7

Hey guys! Im sorry for the delay I've been drowing in coursework and life in general. Thank you so much for your kind reviews it means so much and encourages me to write! Hope you enjoy this one x

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November had been and gone without much event. He'd met up with Scorpius a few more times and they'd been getting close, finding out about each other's lives. Scorpius' parents were better people than they were during the war, Albus was told. Scorpius had also said that he lived in Malfoy Manor, with most of his family as the Manor was so big. His favourite subjects were transfiguration and herbology, and he was undecided on what he wanted to do with his life. When the topic of love life came up, Albus got nervous, but did manage to tell Scorpius that he was gay. "I've never told anyone else. This is quite big." Albus had said with a breathy laugh, and Scorpius had smiled gently and said "I'm honoured." Scorpius said he wasn't sure about his sexuality, as he'd never had a partner, and was figuring things out. This naturally delighted Albus, as he really was starting fall for that blonde hair and grey eyes. Albus told Scorpius about the whole snitch incident, and had asked if Scorpius had seen Rowell plotting it, but he hadn't seen anything. After the inspection of the Slytherin Quidditch team, they couldn't find out who it was as everyone on the team was found innocent. Albus had had a spontaneous panic attack in a corridor, but he blamed it on the paranoia he'd been feeling over being watched by Rowell and his mates, and that they were plotting something big against him. Luckily James was on hand to help him, and the panic didn't last too long.

But now it was mid December, and the Christmas holidays were fast approaching. Albus and his family would go home for Christmas, and he'd have to say goodbye to Scorpius until the new year, but they would write to each other. His friends and family didn't know about his friendship with Scorpius, and he was really hoping they'd be cool and accepting and not hold old grudges. Albus was especially looking forward to being out of Rowell's reach, and he hoped that being away from him would keep his anxiety and panic attacks at bay while he was home. He really didn't want his parents finding out about it, he was dealing with it by himself and he wanted it to stay that way. But of course, Rowell wouldn't let Albus leave Hogwarts without saying good bye.

Albus was walking back from the Quidditch pitch after doing some practice on his own. He knew it could be risky walking alone, but he needed the time alone just to gather his thoughts. Unfortunately, he wasn't left alone. Rowell didn't bother announcing his presence, he simply grabbed Albus and shoved him against the stone wall. Albus felt the pain in his back and winced. Rowell and his mates were surrounding him, pointing their wands at him so he couldn't escape. Albus felt extremely claustrophobic, and immediately felt the panic rise in his throat like bile. "Thought you'd seen the last of us? Thought we'd leave without saying good bye?" Rowell began with menace "You thought wrong. We cursed the snitch, and just because it's the holidays and you're going home, doesn't mean you escape us. We'll be keeping in touch, regularly." Rowell grinned an unpleasant grin, and Albus really tried to calm himself and get his breathing normal. He could feel his palms sliding down the wall from sweating. "We'll be seeing a lot more of each other in the new year too. I'll make sure of it." Rowell said. Albus didn't see it coming, but he suddenly felt hot pain in his abdomen. Rowell had brought his knee hard into Albus' stomach, and Albus let out a groan, and had to prevent himself from gagging. "Pathetic." Hissed Rowell, and Rowell grabbed Albus by the hair and pushed him away. Rowell and his mates took off to the Slytherin common room, leaving Albus clutching his chest desperately trying to stop hyperventilating. Albus was scared to death, he felt so weak and vulnerable and he hated how much they could scare him. He really hoped he could still have a few peaceful days at Christmas, but he found that unlikely now. After so many minutes, the panic had passed, and Albus made his way back to the common room, feeling the bruise on his stomach.

****************Time break*****************

Albus and the rest of the common room were packing the last of their things ready to board the Hogwarts express for Christmas. Albus' anxiety had been sky high because of the last encounter with Rowell, and he felt like carrying mirrors so he could always see behind him. He'd told Scorpius about it, and he was understanding of his worry and said "Write to me whenever you want to Albus and keep me updated, I'll do anything to help." and Albus felt his heart swell with gratitude. Scorpius had also reminded him that teachers could also be trusted and he should probably tell one, but Albus just shook his head several times and that was that.

Albus dragged his case down the stairs and met his family at the bottom. Lily, Rose and Hugo all looked excited for their holidays and James was cool and calm. He stretched his limbs and said "This term goes so fast, yet I feel drained." Albus stared at his brother's toned muscles, and felt a sudden pang of jealousy. He'd always known his brother was more attractive than him, but right now it was so obvious that Albus could barely look. Albus looked down at his own arms, which were less tonned and shorter, and to the rest of his body. _I am pathetic._ Albus inwardly sighed befre Rose brought him back to reality. "Albus, I said have you got everything?" she asked with some concern. Albus nodded with a small smile, and they made their way out of the common room to Hogsmede station.

The train journey was long and wet, and Albus spent most of the time watching the rain splatter the windows like giant tears. _I wonder if I've cried this many tears_ he thought whilst gazing at the rain drops. _Probably, I'm such a wimp._ Albus jumped when another explosion happened in his compartment; the others were enjoying a game of exploding snap but Albus didn't want to join in. He saw a slim willowy figure with blonde hair walk past the compartment. He thought it could have been Scorpius and his heart perked up, but they had gone past now. James came and shuffled next to Albus, noticing his solemn mood. "Albus what's up? You've been in a world of your own all day." he asked. Albus shrugged. "I'm fine James."

"Please stop lying, I want to help, I'm your brother." James said looking Albus in the eye. "Don't get all cringy." Albus frowned, but James cut him off. "Its not a joke Albus. Please tell me." Albus sighed, he wasn't going to tell him about Rowell, but he wanted to get something off his chest. "Okay okay, so I've made a new friend this term. And it's Scorpius Malfoy." Albus said quickly. James' eye brows lifted, but he smiled slightly. "Well he wouldn't be my first choice, and I certainly don't think he'll be dads, but I'm glad you're making friends. He seems nice anyway." Albus breathed out slightly, and decided to just not think about what he was going to say next. "There's another thing too. I haven't said because no ones ever really asked, but, I'm gay." Albus held his breath and James looked surprisingly calm. "Well there's nothing wrong with that, you don't need to look so nervous Al. So that's why you never really discussed girls with me…" James smiled knowingly. Albus breathed a sigh of relief, but James still hadn't made the connection between Scorpius and him being gay. _Wait for it._ Albus thought. Suddenly, James' eyes widened. " _Oh_ " he said. "Ah" and he smiled knowingly. "Little Albus has a crush!" and James ruffled Albus' hair. "Okay okay, never call me that again." said Albus looking pink in the cheeks. "Well I'm not sure how Dad will take all this, but me and your family will support you, and I think you'd look so good together." said James with a reassuring smile. Albus felt so grateful for his brother, and it even relieved some of his anxiety. "Thank you James, it means so much." said Albus. "No worries bro." replied James. "Should I keep it a secret or can the others know?" Albus thought for a moment. "You can tell them, but when I'm not there so I don't get embarrassed." he said. "Sure." replied James. The train ride home was a lot easier after that.

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Hope you enjoyed! x


	9. Chapter 8

Hey guys sorry for the slow update, but this is a long chapter :), thank you so much for your reviews again they mean the world to me! I'll update as soon as I can but uni and college is giving me hell at the moment, love you all! x

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Harry and Ginny Potter were waiting for their children on platform 9 and 3/4 , along with Hermione and Ron Weasley. They all smiled fondly when the scarlet red steam train came into view, and they were instantly brought back to being young again. The train came to a halt with a squeal from the brakes, and the students started to depart the train. Harry was looking for one of his own when he saw a tall, willowy looking boy with shiny blonde hair and glasses get off the train. He felt he knew the face, but had never seen him before. Harry watched him walk towards his parents who were... _Oh. Of course he's Draco's son._ Harry thought. It seemed so obvious now they were next to each other. Draco looked a lot kinder now older, his tense facial features had relaxed into a normal and friendly looking face, and he embraced his son fondly, as did his mother. His son looked intelligent and friendly enough, but Harry had no idea what he was like. Harry suddenly realised Draco was looking at him too, and their eyes met. Harry flushed but offered a smile, and Draco returned one. Draco waved at him and departed the platform with his family. _Amazing._ Harry thought, how different they all were now, since Voldermort's fall. Harry felt a nudge in his side; Ginny had spotted the children and was smiling to greet them. Harry grinned as he felt the pride in his chest, and went to hug James first.

James, Lily, and Albus were enveloped in a hug by their parents, and James and Albus squirmed to get away (Lily was giggling). "How was your term? I hope you haven't eaten too much today, your grandma is round with the family and she's cooking us a nice tea to welcome you all home." said Ginny. Albus breathed a sigh of relief, he felt safe around his family, plus his Grandma Molly's cooking was jaw dropping. Albus was still feeling anxious, but was glad to be in the safe hands of people he cared about the most. He'd write to Scorpius tonight and tell him how he was doing. _Clingy_ said an involuntary thought in Albus' head. He managed to ignore it. The Potters passed through the barrier at platform 9 and 3/4s with the Weasleys, and they made their way to number 12 Grimmauld Place which was now the Potter family home. When they arrived, Albus and his siblings went to go and unpack, but before Albus could go upstairs, Harry called him. "Albus, can I talk to you for a second?"

Albus swallowed hard, and followed his dad to his study. He stood in front of Albus with a sincere look on his face and asked "Albus, are you ok? Did something happen this term?" Albus thought for a moment, _I can't tell him anything, I can't give away anything._ "No I'm fine, why?"

"You seem rather distant, and you look thinner to me. Me and your mum worry about you." Harry replied. "Is someone giving you a hard time? Please tell me." Albus suddenly had the horrible notion that his dad already knew everything about Rowell and his panic attacks, but how could he know? James wouldn't tell, surely not? Albus felt hot, and decided he needed to escape this uncomfortable confrontation. "Dad honestly I'm fine. Just a bit stressed over school work that's all." Albus replied with as much conviction as possible, backing away to the door. "Well please come to me if you need anything. You can trust me Al." said Harry with a warm smile. "Oh and Albus, well done on the quidditch match!" Albus quickly muttered a thank you and sped out of the office and up the stairs. _That was extremely uncomfortable_ Albus thought whilst taking deep breaths. He got to his room and closed the door behind him. He leant his head back on the dark ebony door, and took a deep breath. Keeping all these secrets was exhausting for Albus, he could barely keep up with all of them. _This will kill me...but I can't let them know everything, that will kill them._ Albus began to unpack to take his mind off the bad thoughts, when he came across his quill and parchment. He remembered Scorpius' words about asking him to write to him, and Albus went to his desk.

 _Dear Scorpius,_

 _I know it's the very beginning of the holidays, but I needed to get some things off my chest. I told James on the train that we made friends, and he was surprised, but he wants to get to know you better and he doesn't hold any grudges, and I'm sure the others will be just as understanding. Also, I told James I'm gay, he was a bit surprised but he was cool about it, and said that he and the others would support me._

 _I suppose I'm feeling better after getting a few secrets off my chest, but I'm just still so anxious all the time, I don't know what to do. I can't tell them because they'll all be mad at me for keeping it from them for this long, and they'll never leave me alone. I don't want to endanger anyone, I can't believe I even told you as you're in the same house as them, they could easily get to you._

 _I hope you're enjoying your holidays, write soon, Albus_

Albus re read and sealed the letter and gave it to the family owl Caesar; a strong tawny owl with brilliant amber eyes. He flew gracefully out of Albus' window, and Albus watched him fly into a murky, winter sky. Albus felt weak, paranoid, and very vulnerable sitting in his bedroom. He felt a prickling on the back of his neck, and was reminded of Rowell's breath as he whispered horrible things into Albus' ears. He felt he was being watched right now by him, and Albus was a sitting duck. Albus whipped around suddenly, but there was no one there, he was alone. He collapsed onto his bed and put his head in his hands, trying to overcome the inevitable panic attack that was taking over his body. He was unsuccessful. _This is ridiculous. There's no one even here. I'm alone._ The rational thoughts could not overpower the irrational ones, and it was only when he heard the front door opening downstairs that reality started to return to him. His family were here for the dinner his Grandma Molly was cooking, and Albus would be expected down stairs any second. "Albus, James, Lily! Grandma and Grandpa are here!" Ginny called down the stairs. He heard James and Lily walking across the landing, but Albus' panic wasn't completely gone yet. If people started hugging him it could make it a lot worse, and that would be a very awkward conversation with his mum and dad. He decided to call James before he could get down stairs. James came into the room. "Al we need to - what's up?" James walked quickly to where Albus was sat on his bed. Albus always felt calmer in James' presence, he was his rock, his way back to reality. "Al it's fine, you're safe with us here." said James soothingly. James rubbed Albus lightly on the arm, and Albus' breathing began to return to normal. Albus took a few more deep breaths and said "Thank you James. Sorry about that."

"What have I told you about apologising about it? You don't need to, it's fine." James replied. He gave Albus a quick squeeze, "You ok to go down now?" he asked.

"Yea thanks." replied Albus. "Please don't tell mum, make up something." James frowned. Like Scorpius, James wanted Albus to talk to his mum and dad, but Albus always refused. James sighed an ok, and they made their way downstairs. Albus felt more exhausted than he did during term time, and hoped his Grandma's cooking would revive his spirits.

The rest of the Weasleys arrived, and the smell of a warm roast dinner soon filled every corner of the house. The extension charm had been set on the dinning table, and everyone was pulling crackers and telling stories. Albus, James, Lily, Rose, and Hugo all sat at one end of the table, with Roxanne, Teddy, and Victorie close by. James had told the others just before that Albus was gay and that he had a crush on Scorpius Malfoy. Albus was ok with them knowing, but he couldn't help feel embarrassed by Rose and Lily's knowing smiles from across the table. Molly announced to everyone that the dinner was ready, and started filling up everyone's plates in front of them. It was a mountain of gravy, potatoes, carrots, sprouts, turkey, parsnips, cabbage, and probably some pigs in blankets that Albus would have to dig out from under the rest of his food. Everyone immediately started tucking in, and there was a mixture of mms and ahs at the delicious flavours. "This is amazing Molly, thank you so much for doing this!" said Harry. Molly was always modest and just nodded and said "For all my children and grandchildren, anything." Ron piped up through a mouthful of potatoes "By the way Albus, James, your dad told me about the quidditch match! Nice one!" and he did a thumbs up, Hermione rolled her eyes. "Thanks Ron! We're well on our way to winning the cup this year." said James with pride. Albus hadn't managed to win the quidditch cup yet, but he was a stronger player now he was older and thought he might have a chance. Plus, he wanted to do it for his dad, as he was seeker once too, and wanted to live up to his father's reputation of being an amazing seeker. _That'll never happen._ Said another involuntary thought, Albus waved it away in his head, trying to ignore that he believed it. "We need a match together, definitely. Me, Harry, Ginny, George, Teddy, maybe not you Hermione." Ron said whilst patting her hand. Hermione looked annoyed but Albus saw her breathe a sigh of relief, she hated flying. "Then on the other team, Albus, James, Roxanne, Hugo, Rose, Lily." Lily, Hugo and Rose didn't have that much experience in quidditch, but they all nodded their heads excitedly at the prospect of beating their parents at something. Everyone was nodding their heads, but Molly interrupted, "Now it's fine by me, but please don't be injuring each other, I don't fancy a trip to St Mungo's"

"Oh mum we'll be fine! It's not duelling, it's quidditch!"

"Exactly! Harry lost all the bones in his arm once because of a match. Poor thing."

Harry looked embarrassed but all the adults squirmed at the memory. "That was that idiot Lockhart's fault, remember, the one you used to fancy?" said Ron. Molly's cheeks turned to the colour of the beetroot on the table, and she started to clear away empty plates.

Everyone leaned back on their chairs, holding their full bellies, Albus could barely move he was so full. Gentle conversation filled the room, and Lily took this as an opportunity to begin quizzing Albus. "So, when are you going to make a move on Scorpius?" she asked in not the quietest voice. "Lily keep your voice down!" whispered Albus. "And I don't know, he may not like me back. I want to leave it a bit longer and see where it goes, I don't want to ruin the friendship." Lily rolled her eyes, obviously impatient. "Well has he said anything about his sexuality or love life?"

"Well I asked and he said he doesn't really know as he's never had a partner, so I'm guessing he would be willing, but I don't want to get my hopes up to be disappointed." finished Albus.

"Well I think he likes you, and I know you're writing to each other over the holidays so you must be close." said Lily with a smug grin. Albus frowned, how did she know that Albus had already written to him? "I saw Caesar flying out of your window and I can only assume by your face that it is Scorpius." she said casually. Albus would have to watch Lily more closely, he didn't want her spying on him.

"I think you'd look so cute together!" Rose said with a giggle, and Lily nodded with her. Albus rolled his eyes, but he felt so much gratitude towards his family for being so supportive, he felt so much calmer and safer now. Later in the evening, all the family left Grimmauld Place, leaving the Potters to get to bed. Albus felt so much better that evening, and managed to fall into a peacful sleep. _I have the best family._


	10. Chapter 9

Hey guys so so sorry for the delay! Been super busy but I promise I'll try to keep updating, I love writing this fic. Thank you so much again for your kind reviews you are amazing! Hope you enjoy this one.

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Christmas day had arrived at Grimmauld Place, and James, Albus, and Lily awoke to filled stockings at the end of their beds. Lily burst into Albus' room with James trailing behind her screaming "Merry Christmas!" hugging her stocking like a young child, whilst Albus and James rubbed the sleep out of their eyes. Albus saw that his stocking was full to the brim, and he reached for it. Outside the window was a light snowfall, and Caesar was tapping on the window with his beak. _A letter._ Albus had sent Scorpius a Christmas card, _this must be one back from him._ Albus felt butterflies in his stomach. Scorpius had replied to Albus' previous letter saying that he was pleased Albus had opened up to his friends about his sexuality and their friendship, but still protested that he should tell them and his parents about the bullies and anxiety. Albus loved how much Scorpius cared for him, but felt guilty for not heeding his words. Lily brought him out of his day dream, "Albus you have a letter" she said pointing to the window, "I wonder who that's off?" she said knowingly. Albus rolled his eyes and let Caesar in. He took the letter from his beak and Caesar nibbled his finger affectionately, before flying gracefully out of the window to hunt. The letter had _Albus_ written on the front in Scorpius' elegant hand, and Albus set it aside to open later. Lily protested that Albus was taking too long, and she dragged him away from the letter and took Albus down stairs.

The living room had a cosy fire lit beneath the mantle piece, where Christmas cards with happy moving pictures on stood. The windows were long and snow covered, and the soft red carpet had been covered with presents. Harry and Ginny came down and wished their children a Merry Christmas, still yawning and stretching their tired limbs. Harry always felt emotional on Christmas day; he was so proud of his family and the fact that he, Harry Potter, had raised his own children. He had given to his children what he couldn't have with his real parents, even though Christmas with the Weasley's was always like being with family. He watched them smile as they opened their presents, always grateful for their knitted jumpers off their Grandma, the mountains of chocolate frogs, peppermint toads, and new joke products from George. Harry had chosen for Albus and James a broom care kit. Albus was so grateful for this, but was reminded of the pressure to catch the snitch and win the quidditch cup, and to be an amazing player just like his father. Albus shook away the thoughts; quidditch was one of the only things that calmed Albus down and he didn't want it to make him anxious. James ran upstairs to get his broom and immediately started polishing the handle, but Ginny told James to wait until later. "It's a shame you're not as eager to clean that broom as you are to clean your room." she said rolling her eyes. The Potter's were going over to the burrow for their Christmas dinner made by Molly, and all the family would be there. Albus loved Christmas day with his family, he felt like he belonged somewhere and felt warmer inside. They all got dressed and took their places in front of the fire. They knew the floo network would be busy but they decided that side along apparition could easily get messy, with Lily having never done it before. Ginny threw the floo powder into the flames and they quickly turned to the bright emerald green colour Albus was familiar with. Lily went first, then it was Albus' turn. He walked into the heatless flames and tucked his elbows in as he shouted "The Burrow". Albus felt himself jerk, and was whizzing past other fireplaces, seeing glimpses of red, green, and gold. He arrived with a pop in the fireplace of the burrow, and brushed the soot from his chest.

Molly was there to greet him. "Ah! Another grandchild!" she said with a smile. She walked over to Albus, grabbed his cheeks and kissed him roughly on the forehead. Albus squirmed a little, and was saved when he heard James arrive at the burrow. George, Angelina, Fred and Roxanne were already here, along with Ron, Hermione, Rose and Hugo, Bill, Fleur, Victorie, Dominique, Louis, and all the other Weasley families. When the rest of the Potters arrived, Molly called everyone to sit round the enormous table that had been laid out for the dinner. Molly waved her wand gracefully as plates, jugs of gravy, and bowls of stuffing and beetroot flew down the table, landing neatly in front of chairs. Albus and all the other grandchildren sat at one end, whilst the adults sat at the other; Teddy and Victorie were sort of in the middle. Everyone began chatting about the year they'd had, and Albus and James were immediately hounded by the older grandchildren about Hogwarts and Quidditch. "I hope they still take it seriously, Quidditch I mean. I think it should be an O.W.L." said Teddy seriously. Rose scoffed "That's not a proper subject, it's a game!"

"Yes and a very important one!" said James in defense, Roxanne and Albus nodded in unison. Rose rolled her eyes, clearly not wanting to have an argument about it, and went back to her potatoes. "Did I hear a mention of O. ?" said George looking offended. "It's Christmas, we don't talk about those sort of things at this time of year, it's rude." Albus and the others laughed, but Hermione looked concerned. "It's not rude it's important, especially for James in his fifth year." James looked uncomfortable at the mention of how close his exams were getting, and changed the subject.

The evening went on and Albus felt at peace, maybe with a little indigestion on the side. He and the others went to play in the snow outside, and James threw snowballs at terrifying speed at Albus. As Keeper, he had strong arms that could take anyone out.

 _You're weaker than him_.

Albus shook the involuntary thought away; they were becoming a recurring nuisance. After a while, Ginny called them in to warm by the fire before they would head home. Albus shook the snow from his hair, and stamped his boots on the mat. He warmed his hands in front of the dancing orange flames of the fire, and watched the snow melt on his coat sleeves. He hoped he wasn't as vulnerable as those snowflakes that didn't stand a chance against the heat. He stared at them, until it was time to leave The Burrow. James unfortunately noticed and gave Albus the 'Are you ok' look. Albus just smiled and nodded slightly and James looked away. The Potter's said their good byes and thank yous to everyone, and departed one by one through the fire place. Albus was again whirling past different fireplaces, before he reached his own with a pop. It was then he remembered the letter he still had to read from Scorpius. Albus sprinted up the stairs to his bedroom, closing the door behind him. He picked up the envelope, opening it very carefully. Inside was a beautiful picture of snowy mountains and pine trees, and the words 'Merry Christmas' were written in the corner. Albus opened the card, and read the message.

 _Dear Albus,_

 _Merry Christams! The picture on the front is one I took from being in Austria one Christmas. The landscape is beautiful, I feel like the picture only gives a tiny portion of how beautiful it really is. I hope you have a merry and peaceful Christmas, you deserve it. I'd love to spend it all with you, but of course it's a time to be with family as well. Write to me again soon, and stay safe._

 _Scorpius_

The butterflies in Albus' stomach were flying around so fast he felt he may be lifted into the air. The card was short but so sweet, and he loved the way Scorpius wrote, the way he talked...everything. He admired the picture more, before placing it on his bedside table to remind him that Scorpius was there for him. A tapping at the window brought Albus out of his admiring. It was Caesar, and he was back with another letter in his beak. Albus opened the window to let him in, and noticed the owl wasn't in a good mood. He brushed past Albus after he retrieved the letter, and perched on top of his wardrobe in a sulk. Albus frowned and looked at the letter. It had Albus written on it, but he didn't know the handwriting. He opened the envelope and there was a single piece of paper inside, it was a short letter, and it didn't say Dear Albus.

 _I've been watching you, looks like you had a good Christmas dinner at the Weasley's place._

Albus was confused for a second, then realised it could only be one person who would start a letter like that. Rowell.

 _Hope you hadn't forgotten about me, I've been thinking about you, and about how much fun we'll have when we start back at school. Thought I'd send you this thoughtful letter as a present for Christmas, to remind you that you can't escape me, I'll always be there, and you'll never tell anyone. If you do, it'll be the last thing you and your friends do._

Albus was horrified, he was numb with the shock, so many questions were buzzing around his head. How did he know his owl? Had he really been watching him all this time? If so how? He read on.

 _To finish, I thought I'd draw you a nice picture. Look on the other side._

Albus turned the paper over slowly, and noticed his hands were shaking. The picture was drawn in red ink that looked horribly like blood. It was of Albus watching on as Rowell tortured James, Lily, Hugo, and...Scorpius. _Shit. He knows about Scorpius._ The picture suddenly burst into flames and burnt Albus' hands. He dropped the hot paper and watched the tiny pieces fall to the ground.

Albus felt like he was vibrating, he couldn't hear anything, but he could feel his chest heaving up and down as he was hyperventilating. He felt the sweat all over his body, and the world seemed to be tipping sideways like a boat in a storm. Rowell knew about his friendship with Scorpius, he wasn't safe around him anymore, he knew how to watch him, he could be watching him now, and he was planning more attacks on Albus. Albus heard himself wimpering and wheezing as he struggled to breathe, and saw his whole body shaking as he looked down at himself. This was the worst he'd ever panicked. He looked wildly around the room for a sign of a person or someone watching him, but there wasn't anyone there. He faintly heard someone say Albus, and whipped around to face the door. Albus yelled when he saw his Dad standing there, still in massive panic attack mode and unable to breathe. Albus was almost crying now, he hated when it made him cry. He saw his Dad's face full of worry and saddness, but Albus tried to back away when he came towards him. "Albus what's the matter? Talk to me." said Harry, taking cautious steps towards Albus. James and his Mum appeared behind Harry, and Albus felt overwhelmed. The room was too small, there wasn't enough air for him in here, he was going to suffocate. He saw James come towards Albus fast, realising what was happening, but that didn't help either. James' usual soothing presence was useless now, Albus didn't know where he was. Albus began to feel tingly, and the world started to grow darker. It was then he found himself hitting the floor, and blacking out.


	11. Chapter 10

Hey guys I'm so sorry for the late update, I'm incredibly busy at the moment as my exams are coming up and my coursework deadlines are too. I'll try and update probably at the beginning of May but I'm not sure. If you haven't already go and check out my one shot I wrote! Hope you enjoy this x

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Albus opened his eyes slowly. He couldn't remember closing them, or lying down for that matter. There was a gentle light above his head, and he saw the dark outlines of three people that were looking over him. Slowly their faces came into focus, and the memories hit Albus hard. His Mum looked close to tears, but he saw relief wash over her when Albus opened his eyes fully, whereas his Dad had a permanent expression of deep concern on his face. James resembled this expression, and he was biting his nails anxiously. Albus sat up slowly and Ginny piped up immediately. "Are you feeling well enough to sit up? Do you feel faint?"

"Mum I'm fine thanks, I'm not faint anymore." said Albus with slight embarrassment. His Dad took this as the go ahead to begin asking questions. "What was wrong Albus? You looked so frightened, and then you just passed out." Albus swallowed, but tried to keep cool about it. "I just wasn't feeling well, must have eaten something bad today but I'm feeling better now-"

"Albus" James had cut him off, looking Albus directly in the eye, "Don't" he finished quietly. He spoke in such a disappointed and saddened tone that Albus felt a pain in his chest. James knew that Albus was lying, he knew Albus' panic attacks well, and knew that that one was particularly severe. James had always kept them from their Mum and Dad on Albus' strict orders, but Albus knew that James wouldn't keep it any longer, not after today. Albus felt cornered, he was the prey and they were the predators, and there was no escape. _No, I need to stay calm, for them._ Albus took a deep breath. "Please be honest Albus, we need to know." Ginny reassured him.

"Has James told you anything yet? How long was I out for?" he asked them.

"No, he wouldn't tell us, he said that you should do it. And you've only been out twenty minutes." replied Harry. Albus sighed. He wished James had told them something at least, just so Albus would have somewhere to start, and not have to watch his parents faces turn into ones of disappointment.

Albus inhaled deeply in an attempt to calm his nerves, but it didn't improve much. "Well, basically I had a panic attack, and I get them quite a lot at school." Albus managed to squeeze out, speaking as fast as he could. His parents looked sympathetic, but Albus felt they were looking at him like he was wounded, and he didn't like that. Albus averted his eyes from his parents gazes. "Oh Albus, how long have you been having them?" Ginny asked. "Since...since my first year, they've got more frequent since then." replied Albus with some shame in his voice. He felt guilty for having hidden them for so long, but he only wanted what was best and he didn't want them to be worrying about him. Albus felt pathetic in front of them. He wanted to be someone else in that moment, someone who was stronger and that could handle anything. Ginny and Harry looked at eachother, then back at Albus. They felt ashamed for never having noticed the panic attacks. Albus continued, "James helped me get through them, helped calm me down, and still does now. But there was never a permanent solution." Harry's face turned to one of anger as he rounded on James. "You knew about this and you didn't tell us?" he said in disbelief.

"I wanted to tell you! Really I did! But every time I brought it up to Albus he'd get so afraid and worried of you knowing, he never wanted you to know." James said in his defence, and Albus nodded in response. Non of this was James' fault and he didn't want to drop him in it. James was his rock through those rough times, and Albus needed him. "Why didn't you want us to know Albus? Do you not trust us?" asked Harry with confusion.

"It's not that. I thought you wouldn't understand, or you'd think I was weak and wonder why I was ever placed in Gryffindor-" Albus began to ramble with uncontrollable emotion. Too many thoughts had been bottled up. "I thought you'd be embarrassed and just say 'pull yourself together' and wonder if I was even your son because I'm so weak-" Albus felt tears begin to sting his eyes, and his throat felt tight, like it was closing up on him. "You, mum, and everyone else in the family are so brave and amazing and wonderful, and I'm so small and I'm nothing!" Albus was crying now, he hated himself for it, but it was out of his control. He felt incredibly vulnerable and weak sat on his bed in front of his parents and his brother, sobbing and rambling between shudders of sadness. He hid his face in his hands in an attempt to rebuild the walls that had been torn down by his parents, hoping if they could not see his face they would forget the pain he was in and leave him alone. Of course this was a delirious thought, and Albus felt exposed, naked in front of them. With his face still in his hands, he didn't see the pair of arms that enveloped him in a tender but secure hug. Albus tensed up, but relaxed when he realised it was his Dad. Albus felt him stroking his hands through his hair, and rocking him slightly back and forth to calm him. "Albus Severus Potter." his Dad's voice spoke with gentle severity. "You are everything to me and your family, you are priceless. You are our son, you always will be, and we're so proud to have you." Albus was still crying, but his Dad's words were soothing to his emotional wounds. "You are not weak. Being upset or anxious, or having panic attacks does not make you a weak person. You're so brave having dealt with this for so long, but it's time you let people help you to get better. You don't need to be afraid, no one will judge you." The gratitude swelled in Albus' chest, and he felt more at home in his father's arms than he ever had before.

A silence passed over a few minutes, before Albus pulled away from his father and wiped the remaining tears from his face. He was feeling a lot calmer now, and had gained some sort of catharsis from crying into his father's chest. "Feeling better now?" asked Ginny, rubbing his shoulder.

"Yes thanks." replied Albus. Albus wasn't 100%, but he certainly felt the absence of a weight in his chest. "Good. Now is there anything else you're not telling us that we should know about?" she asked looking him in the eye. Albus hesitated for a moment. He knew the right thing to do was tell them about Rowell, but he could be watching them right now, and Rowell had given a warning in that letter that there would be consequences if he told anyone. James caught his eye, he had one eyebrow raised as if to say 'you know there is'. Albus looked away quickly, and decided to let go another secret. "Well, I suppose I should tell you this. So I made a knew friend this term, but I'm not sure how you'll react to who it is." Harry and Ginny looked confused, but waited for him to carry on. "Well, the person is Scorpius Malfoy."

There was a silence, in which Ginny and Harry looked at eachother, Albus couldn't read their facial expressions. Then to his utter surprise, his father laughed. "Well I'm surprised, I never thought my children would befriend his, I honestly thought I'd never see him again, thought he'd be one to run away from his past. But if his son is your friend then who am I to judge, I don't know what Scorpius is like. What is he like?" asked Harry curiously. Albus breathed a sigh of relief, before continuing.

"He's not like how you told Draco was in school, in fact he's the opposite. He's a Slytherin, he's very clever, but he's not pompous or nasty, he's really kind and friendly." Ginny had looked sceptical at first, but that seemed to have faded from her face, as she now looked surprised. "I was worried you'd be angry at my choice of friends, but I trust him, he's nice." said Albus inwardly blushing. _Not to mention he's gorgeous._ His parents both smiled, and James was smiling too. "I can vouch for that." said James, and Albus grinned at James for his support, despite the fact they'd never properly met. "We're not angry Albus, we're just surprised. If you like him then we trust your judgement of character, maybe we'll get to meet him one day." said Ginny reassuringly. Albus grinned, feeling so thankful that he had supportive parents. "Well it's getting late now, you two should be off to bed. Let us know if you need anything." said Ginny as she and Harry got up to leave Albus' room, with James following them. "Albus, don't hesitate to talk to us about anything. Good night." his father said fondly.

"Good night." Albus called after them, and they closed the door behind them. Albus lay back on his bed, feeling safer and calmer now than he had done in a while. He was so glad they had accepted Scorpius as his friend, he just wondered how they would have reacted if he'd told them it could be more than a friendship... _I think I'll tell them that at a later date._ Thought Albus. But then he remembered the letter from Rowell, and his happiness seemed to evaporate. Scorpius wasn't safe around Albus anymore, how could he continue to be his friend when he was putting him in danger? Rowell knew Scorpius and him were friends, but not that he'd confided in Scorpius about the bullying, at least he assumed. If Albus discussed it with Scorpius, and Rowell overheard, Scorpius would be in a lot of trouble, and it would be very easy for them to get to him. _They share the same common room, it'd be all my fault._ Albus ran his hands through his hair and sighed heavily, he could feel a headache coming on. He really couldn't keep up with himself anymore, all the secrets he'd kept were chaining him to the ground. _But it'll be my fault if someone gets hurt..._ Albus fell into a weak and troubled sleep, seeing the burning flames of the letter over and over again.


	12. Chapter 11

Hello guys I am so so sorry this is so late! I've been having a busy time with preparation for my exams and my mental health has been low recently so I've not been very motivated. The next chapter will come late June as that's when my exams will be over and I'll have all the time in the world to write for you all (yay). I hope you enjoy this chapter! Love Sylvie

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The new year began with uncertainty and anxiety for Albus, he couldn't believe how much things had escalated in the past 4 months between him and Rowell. Albus had sat at his desk many nights, his quill dangling over blank parchment, a battle in his head at whether he should write to Scorpius about the burning letter, and about the danger he could be in if Rowell knew that Albus had confided in Scorpius about the bullying… But Albus just watched as black spots of ink hit the parchment, and realised it was too risky to send the mail, and found he had no words to describe how he was feeling. Albus thought he could tell Scorpius in person, quickly, far away from the Slytherins where Rowell could not overhear. He thought it best in a classroom, perhaps during potions whilst they were mixing ingredients, so they would look as if in innocent discussion about the lesson. Albus found comfort and reassurance in his plan. He honestly couldn't wait to be around Scorpius again, to see his friendly grey eyes, to go to their favourite meeting places and talk about everything, it was the only thing keeping Albus sane through all this.

 _I need to keep him safe,_ vowed Albus.

It was the end of term, and Albus was just arriving at Kings Cross station, where he would board the Hogwarts Express that would take him to his second home. He dragged his case reluctantly behind him, whilst James and Lily were talking in front of him. James had taken a funny attitude towards Albus ever since the panic attack at Christmas, one minute he would be caring, the next he would seem angry at Albus. Albus sensed this was because he hadn't told the truth to his Mum and Dad, about him being beaten up, about him struggling more than he let on, and James knew even he wasn't aware of the full story. _It's for his protection it's better this way,_ Albus would repeat to himself in his head, which he found was at least twice a day now. He found himself dangerously close to spewing out his secrets to James too often, he had to gain more control. His Mum and Dad however were being as kind as ever. They kept giving him motivational talks, hugs, and kept asking "Do you need a minute?" if Albus looked even the slightest bit distressed. Albus didn't want to seem ungrateful, but it was becoming rather annoying, and he felt even weaker now he was being treated like he was wounded. James was talking about his upcoming O. , and how much revision and homework he still had to plough through, and Lily was calling him a stress head. "James, you're rambling. You'll be fine, just sacrifice a few Quidditch practices if you need- don't look at me like that." For James had a horrified expression on his face, as if Lily had called him a mudblood. Albus smiled slightly, his brother was almost too passionate about the sport. The Potter's leaned through the barrier casually, and were greeted by billowing smoke coming from the scarlet engine. There was a hello from the Weasley's, and quick good byes to Albus, James, and Lily from their parents. As Albus got his extra tight hugs from his Mum and Dad, his Dad said in his ear "Professor McGonagall might have a word with you when you arrive, you're not in trouble." And he smiled before pushing Albus towards the train. _Oh God, what the hell has he told her._ Albus didn't have a chance to ask, as the door of the train shut behind him, and he heard it magically seal with a pop. His parents were waving him good bye with smiles, and he and the others waved back as the train sped away from the platform and into the unknown.

Albus, James, and Lily joined the Weasleys who had already found a compartment, and sat down on the red seats. Albus had walked to the compartment slowly, in the hope of catching Scorpius in the corridor. He hadn't had time to look for him on the platform and was growing impatient with the knowledge that they were occupying the same train, but were not together. Albus took the seat right by the compartment door, so he could take glances through the window without looking odd. James sat next to him, he seemed to be in one of his kinder moods today, and asked "Are you looking for Scorpius?" Albus nodded with a slight grin. "Have you seen him?" he asked James.

"No sorry, you go and look for him if you like, we don't mind." He gestured towards the rest of the compartment. Albus would have loved to go and find Scorpius, but he couldn't risk meeting Rowell on the way. The train corridors were very narrow, and it would be easy for Rowell to get to him and hard to run away. Albus shook his head "It's okay, I can wait" he said with a shrug, not showing any fear to James.

The rest of the train ride was uneventful. No Scorpius to Albus' disappointment, but no Rowell to his relief, and soon Albus found himself unpacking his things in the fourth year dormitory feeling rather isolated.

He was on his way to the great hall for his dinner when Professor McGonagall caught him in the corridor. "Potter." Her stern tones echoed off the walls, "I need to have a word" He had been warned about this by his father, but had no idea what the conversation would be about, and he'd been promised he wasn't in trouble. Albus followed the Professor to her office near Gryffindor Tower, feeling the nerves in his tingling finger tips. They reached her office all too quickly, and Professor McGonagall directed Albus to the chair on the opposite side of the desk to hers. McGonagall sat down gracefully, her robes swinging behind her, and cleared her throat.

"Now Albus," she began, less stern than before, "Har- Your father has informed me that you've been struggling with some form of anxiety and panic attacks for quite a while, and that you've been struggling almost entirely on your own." _Anxiety? Isn't that… a mental illness?_ Albus had only heard of mental illnesses a few times in his life, mostly due to the fact that it wasn't common conversation in Hogwarts, and was never taught in any lessons so people didn't know much about them. His father had dealt with something called post-traumatic stress disorder after the war, and he knew it was usually a muggle term used for people who had been traumatised by something horrible in their life. _I don't have a mental illness, do I?_ Albus suddenly felt scared, and very vulnerable sitting in front of Professor McGonagall. His father had told her things about him that even he didn't know about, and now she knew how weak of a Gryffindor he was, and would no doubt be watching over him around school. He didn't need her finding out about the bullying and her blabbing to his father, he couldn't stand the humiliation and the embarrassment he'd be to his family.

 _Everything's starting to fall apart._ Albus took as deep a breath as he could manage in an attempt to clear his foggy head, he really didn't want to have a panic attack in front of McGonagall. "So me and your father had a talk, and we decided that you should see a therapist once a week at St Mungo's Hospital. They can help you manage your anxiety and give you any advice or support you need." _Great. So that's at least one more person that will know._ The list of people he would have to talk to about his anxiety was getting way too long for Albus' liking, but he admired McGonagall for her offer to help and couldn't throw it back in her face. "That's great, thank you Professor." Albus replied in the most confident voice he could muster, making sure to hold his hands together to hide the shaking. "I'll let you know when your first meeting with them is in the near future. And of course, my office door is always open to you if you need anything. I'm here to help Albus." She smiled warmly. Albus smiled in return, and surprisingly felt a hint of security at her reassuring words. Albus took this as the end of the conversation and stood to leave the office. As he reached the door handle, Professor McGonagall spoke again.

"I know you might think Albus, that your anxiety is a sign of weakness, and you don't feel as brave as you should do belonging in Gryffindor." Albus swallowed hard, that was all true. How was she so intuitive? "I can tell you that you have been incredibly brave in dealing with this on your own. However, seeking help and discussing your problems with others makes you ever more courageous than just dealing with it alone." Albus felt himself grow hot with a mixture of embarrassment and shame, and steadied himself by grabbing the door handle tightly. His father and Professor McGonagall had gotten the help for him, and his parents had practically cornered him to talk about his anxiety. Albus had done nothing courageous, and was still the weakling he always was. "Thank you Professor, I'll keep that in mind." Albus replied quietly, not looking at her, and he left her office.

Albus would not keep that in mind, in fact, he never wanted to think the words again. They tumbled around his head uncomfortably, making it very difficult to navigate his way to the great hall for his first dinner of the term. Albus stopped to lean against the cool stone of the castle to catch his breath, he wasn't in any state to walk into the largest room of the castle full of the whole school. _See, no courage here. Just weakness._ Albus felt even more of a burden to his parents now, and to Professor McGonagall, wasting their time on getting a therapist for him. He had put no effort into seeking help for himself, except maybe from opening up to Scorpius, and he felt such a coward. He'd attempted to shut out people so many times in an attempt to completely deny his anxiety, and now realised that that made him weaker than being open with them about it. _It was supposed to protect them, to stop me being a burden to them_ his brain argued back. His mind was in an endless conflict of keeping his family free of his problems and attempting to deny his anxiety, or accepting his anxiety and allowing his family and friends to help. Albus pulled at his hair in an attempt to stop the cycling of thoughts, and leaned his head back on the wall.

After a few more minutes of deep breaths, Albus finally managed to calm the conflict in his mind to a manageable degree, and entered the great hall to sit with James. He didn't look for Scorpius in case Rowell was watching for any signs of worry or weakness, which he most likely was, and sped towards the empty space next to his brother. "Where've you been? Are you okay?" asked James looking concerned.

"I was just talking to McGonagall; I'll tell you about it later." Albus replied, taking a sip of pumpkin juice to calm his nerves. This wasn't the start of the new year that Albus had hoped for.


	13. Chapter 12

Hello! I AM SO SORRY FOR SLOW UPDATE PLEASE FORGIVE ME! this is like a long chapter so I compensated, I've had a case of writers block and my mental health has been slowing me down but I'm okay. My exams are over and I'm so relieved! Also I'm so excited for the cursed child and I thought elements of it sounded similar to this fanfic which is cool, but no spoilers if you've seen it! Hope you enjoy and any suggestions are very welcome for upcoming chapters, love Sylvie x ps your comments keep me going thank you so much honestly

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Finally, at the end of the first week, Albus had managed to have a conversation with Scorpius about the events of the Christmas holidays. He'd only managed to have light conversation with him in the fear he was being watched by Rowell, but he'd felt more secure in the back of potions where he couldn't over hear, or so he hoped.

Scorpius immediately saw the uneasy look on Albus' face, and furrowed his brows in concern. Those grey eyes locked with Albus' own, and Albus had to calm the giddy feeling he felt in his stomach every time he saw how _beautiful_ Scorpius was. Albus didn't hesitate, "I need to tell you something. It's about something that happened in the Christmas holidays, and I couldn't write to you about it. You'll see why." And Albus told Scorpius everything about the letter, the drawing, and the potential danger if Rowell found out that Albus had confided in Scorpius about the bullying. Scorpius listened intently, he was always good at that, before resting his chin on his hand and staring in thought. After a few minutes Scorpius spoke up, "You won't like this, but I think you really need to tell someone. You're being watched, and you're clearly frightened by this, I can tell you've been walking on egg shells ever since term started." Albus had feared this answer, and he unfortunately started to believe it was his only option. If he wanted to find out how he was being watched and stop it, he had to get people involved. Albus sighed and put his head in his hands, "I think you might be right Scorpius, I'm not sure if I can do this anymore." Scorpius smiled, not out of smugness, but relief that Albus was finally starting to see that talking was a good thing to do.

Albus however was scared, and he pressed his palms into his eyelids in an attempt to shut out the images of the faces of his friends and family, all looking so disappointed at his weakness. He took a deep breath, but feeling Scorpius' gentle hand on his back somehow took the wind out of him. "I'll help you through it if you need me too." He said to Albus, and Albus had never felt safer. After a few minutes of deep breaths, Albus remembered, "Oh I forgot to tell you, I told my parents about us being friends, they took it really well". Scorpius smiled, and the butterflies returned once again. "That's great Al, I told my Dad too," And Scorpius' smile dropped slightly, _oh no._ "He was really surprised and seemed a bit annoyed that I wasn't getting on with the Slytherins, which he will _never_ make me do. But he didn't say anything bad against you and your family, and my mum was a lot more welcome to the idea." Albus released the breath he didn't realise he'd been holding, and felt a surge of hope inside him. "Don't worry though, mum will make him be more understanding." Scorpius finished, and squeezed Albus' shoulder reassuringly which sent a warmth down his spine. That was the best potions lesson he'd ever had.

******************************************timebreak****************************************************

It was the day of Albus' first therapy session at St Mungo's, and nervous was an understatement in comparison to how he was really feeling. He had decided he'd tell her about the bullying as a practice ready to tell his family, and he was pretty sure Rowell wouldn't be able to watch him from there. His anxiety had been sky high this past week, and without Scorpius there he would have had several more panic attacks than without him. McGonagall hadn't been helping this, as she had been watching him with her cat like stare from the staff table in the Great Hall every meal time, probably to make sure he was looking after himself. Albus had been eating his meals extra fast, so that he could leave the table early to take deep breaths before going to the common room. James had been there though, giving his shoulder a reassuring squeeze but also space to breathe, checking up on him when Albus was staring nervously over to the Slytherin table. James had wished Albus a good luck for his first appointment, and it had had some of the effect of a calming draft, knowing he would be able to confide in James about it.

Albus was going by fireplace to the part of the hospital where he would have his appointment, and would be going via Professor McGonagall's office. On the way to her office, Albus' stomach had turned over when he saw Rowell walking in the opposite direction towards him. Rowell gave that sickening and sinister smile to Albus, winking, before walking by without touching him. Albus unclenched his hands and felt the breath he had been holding leave him, dropping his stance that was ready for an assault. Somehow, this did not bring comfort to Albus, as he compared Rowell to a snake that was starving itself for a huge meal, ready to indulge all at once (he was a Slytherin after all).

Albus knocked on the door and boarded the spiral staircase that lifted him up to McGonagall's office. She was waiting at her desk for Albus and smiled a gentle smile when he entered. "Good Evening Albus, are you ready to go?" She asked politely. Albus nodded, feeling the nerves set in again, he hated travelling alone to a new place. "Good, well the floo powder is in the pot," she said as she lazily waved her wand conjuring a roaring fire, "The place you are going is called 'St Mungo's, Mind Healing ward'. Don't forget to speak that clearly otherwise you may end up in the wrong ward. When you arrive, give your name to the person at the desk and they will direct you to your appointment, they usually last around an hour." Albus felt like the Professor had been speaking at around a hundred miles an hour, and already began imagining the worst case scenarios of him getting lost and never getting back to Hogwarts. He steadied his hands as he went to grab the floo powder before Professor McGonagall spoke again, "Albus, are you up to this today?" she had obviously noticed his anxious demeanour. Albus swallowed, he wasn't feeling great, but he didn't want to miss this chance of getting help. "I'm fine Professor, don't worry" he replied with a small smile. Albus threw the powder into the flames and they turned the usual brilliant green, and Albus stepped into the fire. "St Mungo's, Mind Healing Ward." He spoke with clear diction, and Albus felt the tug which would take him to the hospital.

Albus arrived with a slight bend of the knees, and made his way to the front desk with caution. Albus had never been here before, and found the wide open rooms with the white and pale blue walls incredibly daunting. He gave his name to the man at the desk, and was told to go to room 20 which was down the right corridor, and that he would be seeing someone called Gwen Summers. Albus' legs felt like jelly as he walked down the corridor that stretched in front of him, and he could hear his own shallow breathing echoing slightly off the walls. He knocked gently on the door after a deep breath, and noticed a picture of Gwen Summers on the door. She was smiling with big white teeth, and had short, wildly curly brown hair, and her dark skin and eyes were glowing from the flash of the camera.

The Gwen Summers that opened the door and greeted Albus looked older, around 35, but still had the same aura of brightness to her face. "You must be Albus, my name is Gwen Summers but you just call me Gwen." She said with a warm smile and shook Albus' hand (considering they were so sweaty she didn't comment which relieved him). Her office was much more colourful than the ward, with deep purple walls, a cream carpet, and many colourful pictures and post cards of landscapes and other people, laughing and waving down at them both. Albus was seated in a comfy red arm chair opposite an identical one, and Gwen sat down gracefully with a content sigh. "So, I'm a mind healer at St Mungo's, and most what I do doesn't actually involve magic. These sessions are something that muggles call 'counselling', and they are designed to help you get to the bottom of the problems you're having in your mind, and rule out other things that could be causing your problems like spells or potions." Her voice was silken, and she was very gentle with her words which made Albus relax into his chair. "So, tell me about why you've been referred here. I already know some back ground knowledge, but I like to hear it from the patient." She had a quill and parchment in her hand ready to record Albus' thoughts, and Albus felt a pressure to get across exactly how he was feeling, he didn't want anything to get over or under stated. So Albus explained, as best he could, about the panic attacks and the anxious feelings he'd been having since starting school, and about the bullying from Rowell. This was hard, especially saying Rowell's name, as a lurch of the stomach followed due to his instinct to not talk about it in fear of him being watched. Gwen sensed this, as she said whilst Albus paused to think "It's confidential here, I'll only inform someone if it puts you in danger, and we're not being listened to." When Albus had told Gwen about the assault, the threats, and the stalking, she frowned at her parchment and said "Albus, it sounds like you may be in danger, and I think I should inform the school about these pupils." Albus knew this was coming, and felt his temperature rise with the thought of the exposure of him being bullied. "I understand," he replied as calm as he could manage, "but I was intending to do it myself, or at least tell my family first before the school. I think that it is time I stop keeping it from them." Gwen smiled,

"I'm glad you have this frame of mind Albus, and I think it will be good for you to tell your family, but by law I will have to inform your head teacher immediately after you have left our session. However, I can inform Professor McGonagall that you are telling your parents and she can call them in to your school for you to tell them and have a talk." Albus thought this was a fair compromise, but he was fearful for the safety of the people around him, he didn't want Rowell to find his parents, his family, or his home.

Gwen asked Albus about the good things he had that kept him calm, grounded, feeling safe. James was his rock through panic attacks, and Gwen seemed pleased that he had such a strong bond with his brother. Then Scorpius came to mind, and Albus told her about the new friendship. "We thought our parents would be mad because they were enemies at school, but so far they're ok with it. I suppose there is a part I missed out though…" Albus swallowed the impending butterflies again. Gwen smiled, she was reading Albus like a book. "Do you want it to be more than a friendship?" she asked. Albus nodded with a slight smile, _oh how I do._ "Well I'm sure you could bring up the subject, if he's understanding then you won't lose the friendship you have with him if he doesn't feel the same way." It was amazing how much Gwen believed in him, she was like Albus' personal cheerleader, encouraging him to do all the things he never could.

A small chime sounded from a golden, ornamental cat perched on her desk, which had used its paw to ding its bell on its collar. "Our session is up, that went so quickly! I'll see you same time next week, look after yourself. The school will keep you protected." Gwen said gently. She showed Albus to the door, "Thank you so much" said Albus, he couldn't express his gratitude enough, she'd made him feel safe and calm which was a rarity in Albus' world. "My pleasure." She replied, and Albus went back to the fireplace feeling a lot better than before.

Albus returned to Professor McGonagall's office, but she wasn't there. He supposed she was dealing with some students or in a meeting, and began to leave the office. He noticed the paintings of the old head teachers were watching him through sleepy eyes, and one with a particularly long white beard and half-moon spectacles was smiling warmly at him. Albus smiled awkwardly back, before turning around and leaving the office. The corridors were dim in the winter evening, and Albus walked steadily to the Gryffindor tower.

He didn't see the dark shadows behind the flames of the torches, or hear their footsteps beneath his own. He did however, feel the large, muscly arm lock around his neck, and his head being pulled upwards. Albus was forced to look into the eyes of Rowell, who was smiling maliciously. Albus' windpipe was being crushed and he tried desperately to choke out a few breaths, which caused Rowell to chuckle. "No need to struggle Albus, we'll look after you." Albus' eyes widened with panic, and he squirmed to try and allow air into his lungs so he could call for help. A jinx cast lazily from Rowell hit Albus square in the face, and Albus slumped into unconsciousness.


	14. Chapter 13

Hello Guys! So I think this is probably the penultimate chapter, its a long one and a lot of secrets and motives will be revealed in this one, I really hope you like it! I've been writing this chapter for a while because I wanted to get it just right and I hope I've done it justice. Also, I read the Cursed Child and *** spoilers*** its so similar to this fanfic! Albus and Scorp best friends, in their fourth year, Voldemort fanatic wants to harm them, I'm kinda annoyed actually because I didn't like a lot of aspects about the cursed child (The non romantic relationship between Rose and Scorp being implied when there was loads of chemistry between Al and Scorp, the whole voldemort had a child thing, the time turners that miraculously didn't get destroyed after all, Ron only being used for comic relief and not the amazing wizard he is, I could go on.) But I loved how Al was in Slytherin, it was a nice change from what we all expected!

Anyway, enough negativity, if you enjoyed the cursed child I'm not judging you, it just wasn't my thing. Hope you enjoy this chapter!

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*From Rowell's P.O.V sort of, not in first person though, idk*

"Keep up Kez, we can't be seen dragging him around" whispered Rowell impatiently to Kez, a fellow Slytherin, who was trailing behind due to the weight of dragging an unconscious Albus down to the dungeons. "I'm trying my best, he's such a fatty." Replied Kez, huffing. They made their way swiftly down to the dungeons and into the abandoned classroom not far from the Slytherin dormitories, without meeting anyone on their way. Rowell shut the door gently, and muttered _Muffliato_ and _Colloportus_ to ensure they wouldn't be disturbed, and cast shielding charms around the outskirts of the room, so if anyone came in they would see an empty room. Kez had shoved Albus up against the back wall and had bound his wrist to a pipe using the _incarcerous_ spell, and the tightening of the ropes caused Albus to stir. Rowell walked over to a weakened Albus, and leaned over him, casting a dark shadow over Albus. "Finally, justice will be served." Spoke Rowell in a low voice, as Albus let out a groan of pain.

James Potter was sat in one of the squishy red arm chairs in Gryffindor tower. He was waiting up for Albus after his first session with a mind healer, and looking at the clock, he realised that Albus must be running a bit late. _Perhaps McGonagall's lecturing him in her office_ he thought with a smirk, he had been on the end of a few of her lectures. He continued to skim through the copy of The Daily Prophet he had picked up off the table, finding nothing interesting, and put it down with a sigh.

"James, if you don't want to read that paper, please stop picking it up over and over again, you're putting me on edge." Said Rose, exasperated. James rolled his eyes,

"I'm bored Rose; Al should be back by now."

"Exactly, and you're constant fidgeting is making me nervous, I'm worried about him. What if he's had a panic attack? He hates talking about his problems to us, let alone a stranger." She sighed and leant her head back against the chair, her plait hitting the upholstery with a thud.

"He'll be alright, they're professionals, they'll know exactly how to handle it if he does have one." Said James despite the worry in his voice.

They both sat in silence for another ten minutes, watching the fire grow ever weaker with the passing of time. Rose was yawning every minute now, evidently tired from all the homework she had been doing, and James watched as her eye lids began to droop. "Rose, you can go to bed if you like, I'll wait for Al." Rose did another giant yawn as she tried to say

"No it's fine, I can stay awake."

James rolled his eyes at her, unconvinced. "Rose, please just go to bed, you look shattered." He said, "Albus will be fine." Rose frowned slightly, but gave in and smiled gratefully at James. "Thank you, good night." She said whilst stretching out of her arm chair, and walked up to the girl's dormitories hiding another yawn. James chuckled silently to himself, and began flicking through the daily prophet again.

He didn't realise he had fallen asleep until he felt his arm being nudged, and heard a stern voice calling his name. "What year is it" he said in a sleepy haze whilst rubbing his eyes. "This is no time for jokes James, you need to come with me. Now. Albus is missing." Spoke Professor McGonagall's voice in hurried tones. James immediately became aware of the severity of this, and clenched his jaw to keep him calm. Lily was stood by her side, biting her nails with nerves, she looked as confused as James did. Professor McGonagall lead them quickly out of the Gryffindor common room before he said "Wait, we should tell Rose- "

"There's no time James, we need to find him. Your parents are just arriving in my office."

James was so confused, how could Albus have gone missing? Was it the floo network, or something more serious? By the look on McGonagall's face and her quick pace, he suspected the latter. He decided not to bombard her with questions until they reached her office.

When they arrived, he heard the grate rumble, and his father tumbled out of the emerald flames looking dishevelled and white with concern. "Dad what's going on?" said James, but his father said nothing, and only hugged both him and Lily tight. Their mother followed, looking stern, like she was ready for an attack, her ginger hair flowing. McGonagall conjured them all a chair, and sat them around her desk.

"I have strong reason to believe that Albus is missing and is in danger, and here is why. I was away for a quick meeting when Albus arrived back to my office after his appointment at 9pm, as Albus Dumbledore here told me he arrived safely," McGonagall gestured to the portrait of the old headmaster, and he waved at them. Harry nodded his head in thanks, now was not the time for sentiment. "I noticed there was a letter for me from his mind healer, Gwen Summers, which I thought unusual as it had only been the first session. I realised it was a letter concerning the safety of Albus, they are legally obliged to inform me immediately if their patient is in danger." McGonagall picked up the letter gravely, and read aloud, "'Albus has informed me of severe bullying from some of the students at Hogwarts, the main culprit named Jeffrey Rowell, 5th Year Slytherin. Albus has reported threats of violence, actual violence from him and accomplices involving Albus being injured, and stalking. He reported a sinister letter from Rowell describing an attack he would carry out on Albus' friend Scorpius Malfoy if Albus told anyone about the bullying, and describing other violent attacks. This has been taking place since his first year at Hogwarts, and has since escalated in his fourth year, and I believe this is damaging his mental health and that Albus could be in danger. I regret that I am disappointed in Hogwarts' failure in finding out about this bullying." McGonagall finished with a slight shudder, looking down at her desk.

The room was silent, Harry's mouth stood ajar, and no air appeared to be entering or leaving his body. Ginny's hands were clenched into fists, and she had angry tears in her eyes. Lily seemed frightened to move, and James was boiling with rage. "I knew he was hiding something!" he bellowed, shattering the silence. "He was injured, and he wouldn't tell us who did it. How dare they threaten him! I'LL KILL- "

"James please stop! This isn't helping." Said McGonagall rather gently, and James took a deep breath, not remembering when he had stood up, and slowly sat back down.

"I have never been so disappointed with myself, four years of bullying has gone right under my nose, and I am to blame. I have let you and your son down Harry, I'm sorry- "

"We don't have time for this Minerva." Interrupted Harry sharply, "What else do you know" McGonagall sighed and continued her story.

"The letter stated that Albus wanted to tell you himself, but of course that had to be abandoned for his safety. I was very eager to know that Albus had returned safely to Gryffindor tower, and contacted the fat lady. By this time, it was ten and I knew he should have returned. Unfortunately, she said no, Albus had not returned nor had she seen him. I knew then that something was wrong, he had gone missing." She sighed and clasped her hands together. "So I contacted you all, and all of the teachers are searching castle, the students haven't been informed yet." She looked exhausted.

Harry immediately perked up "The marauders map! We can find him using that, as long as he hasn't left the grounds." And hope was suddenly in the eyes of the Potters. "You know I don't like that map, but as long as you don't let it fall into the wrong hands, use it." Said McGonagall, and Harry was back in the fire place in an instant. "Professor, are you thinking he's been taken by force?" James asked cautiously, he didn't want to cause more upset. McGonagall swallowed thickly, "I expected the worst, yes, but if he is simply wandering the corridors then at least he is safe for the time being." There was very uncomfortable silence that followed this, as they waited for Harry to come back with the map.

Finally, the grate rumbled again, and Harry was holding the precious marauders map as he climbed from the emerald flames. He immediately pointed his wand at the parchment and said "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good", revealing the map before them. All eyes were searching for Albus' name, until Lily said "There he is! That's an odd part of the castle…"

*****************************meanwhile, back to when Albus was awaking*************************

Albus opened his eyes slowly. The room he was in was dark and smelt damp, and he felt the tug of a rope on his left wrist. Albus looked up into the sinister black eyes of Rowell, and he jerked violently against his restraints. "You won't escape; we took your wand as well." Said Rowell with a certain enjoyment in his voice. Albus' breath quickened as he realised he was a sitting duck, and a sheen of sweat was building on his forehead. "Where am I?" he managed to stutter to Rowell. Albus was met by a cold laugh from him, as he said "Why would I tell you that? I'll be the one asking the questions tonight anyway." Rowell took out his wand and stroked it with an evil glint in his eyes, Kez stood watching with his arms folded like a body guard. Albus stared at the wand wide eyed, realising he was now going into full panic mode. His mouth was dry and his brain felt like mush inside his skull, he tried not to think about what Rowell would do to him.

"I think we should have a bit of fun first, don't you Kez?" said Rowell with that same sinister smile Albus had come to know. Kez nodded his ugly head in agreement, and Rowell pointed his wand at Albus, his face now twisted with anger. "This, is for my family, and for Voldemort. CRUCIO!" Rowell bellowed. Albus felt his bones catch on fire, felt his head split open with the pain he was experiencing, and could only faintly hear his own screams of pain over the whooshing sounds in his ears. He had learned about the cruciatus curse, but nothing could have prepared him for the hell he was going through, the blackness around his vision when Rowell finally lifted the curse, the lack of oxygen in his body that caused his limbs to shake. Albus was panting hard, leaning forward on his one free hand and knees, whilst Rowell chuckled a low and malicious chuckle. "You don't know how long I've wanted to do that Albus, in fact, I think I'll do it again. CRUCIO!" And the pain came again. It was no easier to bear the second time round, Albus felt his throat sting from the screaming he couldn't control. Rowell lifted the curse after what felt like hours, and Albus was horrified to find tears on his cheeks, as he tried to discreetly dab them away. He felt pathetic, cowering beneath Rowell. "It's no use Albus, no one will hear you scream, I've enchanted the room." Rowell took great pleasure saying this to Albus, and Albus felt a deep sense of doom within him.

"Now you've had a taster of the cruciatus curse, hopefully that will encourage you to loosen your tongue. Your father and the rest of your blood traitor family destroyed my family during the Battle of Hogwarts, and now they will pay the price. I've been watching your movements for a long time Albus, but I can't seem to get to you or your family. Something shields it from me. You will lead me to them. You will tell me where you and the other Weasleys live, and I will avenge my ancestors and Lord Voldemort himself." Rowell spoke his plan swelling with pride, and grinned at Albus wildly. Albus couldn't believe what he was hearing, all of this, for a dead cause? "You're – a fanatic." Albus managed to heave out between panting breaths. Rowell growled, "I'm honouring my ancestors, my name, I'm doing what Lord Voldemort intended to do, this cause didn't die with them." He said in a dangerous voice.

Rowell pointed his wand at Albus once more, "Tell me where you live, and where the Weasley's live, or I'll use the curse again." He said in a low growl, his face contorted with vengeance. Albus found something within him at that moment, something that was strong, ferocious. Albus steadied his breath, and said "No", clenching his jaw, prepared for whatever Rowell could throw at him. He would never tell him, never put his family in harm's way just to avoid the pain, he would protect them, even if it killed him. Albus was feeling brave for the first time in his whole life, and it was empowering. Rowell grunted with frustration, and once again bellowed "CRUCIO" at Albus. The pain was still the same, but this time, Albus had a reason to hold onto reality, to hold back the screams, to withstand the pain, for his family.

The curse lasted longer out of Rowell's frustration, and Albus felt himself growing weaker, his vision beginning to blur around the edges. But Albus felt strong in his mind, Rowell would never over power his will to protect his family, the bond was too strong for him to break. "You won't break me, so you might as well kill me." Said Albus between laboured breaths, "I'll never let you hurt them, you sick- "Albus was cut off by another dose of the curse, this time it was Rowell who was yelling with anger. "You have no right to speak to me that way! Your father caused this, you and him will both pay the price." Rowell paced the room for a few minutes, obviously thinking what to do next. "Hadn't anticipated I'd be strong did you? Didn't think I'd resist you?" said Albus with a triumphant grin whilst wiping the blood from his now bleeding nose, knowing he was taunting Rowell.

"Shut-up, Potter. You'll regret talking back to me." Threatened Rowell, pausing to glare at Albus. "Or what? You've done your worst." Said Albus, feeling ever more in control.

Rowell paused suddenly, and Albus saw the light bulb light up behind Rowell's dark eyes, and that feeling of control seemed to melt away. "Of course, how could I have forgotten? I don't need to threaten you anymore; I'll threaten that friend of yours. What's his name? Scorpius." Rowell hissed. Albus felt his heart drop into his stomach, and felt his body turn to ice. There was nothing he could do to stop this except to give up the information, Rowell would make him choose. "I'll give you one more chance. Tell me how to get to your father and your family, or I'll torture Scorpius in front of your eyes." Rowell was grinning now, as he twiddled his wand in his fingers, daring Albus to say no.

Albus couldn't speak, how could he make this choice? He didn't want either, but he knew that was no option. Albus opened and closed his mouth like a fish gulping for air, lost for words at the unanswerable question. Rowell didn't wait for an answer for long. "Fine. Come on Kez, let's go and find Scorpius, I'm sure he'll be delighted." He said with malice.

The panic was back, rising as fast as bile in his throat, "No please, leave him out of this. Leave him alone!" shouted Albus desperately. He had gained back some strength and was struggling with the rope on his wrist. Rowell looked towards the struggling, and contemplated. "Well we can't have you escaping now can we? SECTUMSEMPRA!" he bellowed across the room, and Albus' right thigh was sliced open. Albus yelled out in agony, and soon blood was spilling from the wound, puddling around him on the floor. _I'm going to die here. I'm going to bleed to death._ Was all he could think in a haze of pain and panic. "Try escaping on that bad leg and I think you might just lose it." He faintly heard Rowell laugh coldly, and he resealed the door behind himself.

Albus brought a shaking hand down in an attempt to cradle his leg, but he couldn't bear to touch it. He had never bled so much before in his life, and was already feeling the effects of the blood loss. The room began to spin, and Albus held on to the cracks in the floor in an attempt to steady himself. He attempted to shout, forgetting about the silencing charm on the room, but what left his throat were only strangled cries. His throat was hoarse and dry from the screaming he had done.

 _I'm sorry Scorpius_

Albus felt his body keel over

 _I'm sorry_

**************************************Back to Harry and the others**********************************

Harry leapt down the stairs from McGonagall's office, not bothering to wait for the others. He had to get to Albus, that was all that mattered in the world. He and the others flew through the corridors like gusts of wind, their feet barley touching the ground. The only sounds were panting echoing off the walls, and the drumming of shoes on the stone floors. After an eternity of exercise, they reached the room where Albus was supposed to be. Harry tried the door, and upon realising it was locked, performed the _alohomora_ charm. Harry burst open the door and saw,

Nothing. An empty room sneered back at him. _The map doesn't lie, the map never lies, this can't be happening,_ "The map never lies!" shouted Harry angrily through laboured breaths, he wasn't used to this much running anymore. "Wait." Said Ginny softly. She stepped forward slowly, and outstretched her arm in front of her, pointing her fingers like a ballerina. Ginny felt the wall of magic part at the tip of her fingers as she walked slowly through the shielding charm. Harry caught on as to what she was doing, and followed behind her. What they saw would live with them forever, lingering in their memories like a bad stench, with all the others from the dark days.

"Albus." Harry whispered as he saw his son, slumped against the wall, pale as death itself, surrounded by what looked like 5 pints of blood. Harry was reminded horribly of the fight he'd had with Draco Malfoy in his sixth year, the blood swirling around the bathroom floor. Harry dashed forwards, whilst Ginny got rid of the shielding charm. James and Lily stumbled backwards at the sight in front of them. Lily began to cry, covering her eyes as if shielding herself from the reality in front of her. James, was, being James. Like a cauldron boiling over, face as red as Mars, he kicked the wall with a furious growl, clenching his jaw to breaking point. He clenched his fists, his nails digging into his palms in an attempt to clear his head from the anger.

 _I let this happen to my brother._

Harry broke the rope that was tied around Albus' arm with a point of his wand, and slowly cradled Albus in his arms, as if he were made of paper. Ginny knelt down beside him and stroked his ruffled hair, saying gently "Albus, can you hear us?" Albus stirred gently, and his eye lids fluttered but didn't open fully. They both breathed out the sigh of relief they hadn't realised they'd been holding in. "He's alive" were the only words Harry could speak in that moment, swallowing the growing lump in his throat.

Harry went to lift Albus up in his arms to rush him to the hospital wing, before he heard Albus speak in such a weak voice that he almost let go of his emotions. "Wait." Came Albus' whispering voice, "Scorpius, in danger." Harry and Ginny were wide eyed, and both turned to McGonagall who was now in the door way, her hand covering her mouth as she took in the scene and the words. She looked like she had swallowed a draft of living death. "I need to go to the Slytherin common room, Scorpius isn't safe. Harry, take him to Madam Pomfrey. Ginny, come with me. James and Lily, go into my office, the password in Snitch, and ask the man in the portrait on the far left to contact the Ministry to come to Hogwarts. Tell them I sent them, and I will explain everything when they arrive. Be quick." McGonagall gave everyone the orders, leaving no room for objetions, and Harry was reminded of the soldier McGonagall he had seen at battle for Hogwarts. James, finally glad of a way to help and a way to vent his anger, bolted down the corridor with Lily on his tail. Harry scooped up Albus like broken glass in his arms, and ran down the same corridor.

"Come on Ginny, we don't have much time." Said McGonagall, and they ran towards the Slytherin common room, fire in their eyes.

* * *

Okay PSA! I'm not being prejudice against Slytherins in this fanfic (look at Scorp) I only made the bullies Slytherins because a lot of the wizarding families that supported Voldemort were in Slytherin so it made historical sense. I respect and like Slytherins, my boyfriend is one, and Rowell and his other mean friends are a rarity in the days after Voldemort, thank you!


End file.
